Rediscovering Reality

So... Charlie?

Mariella's POV
I walked into the house and heard voices from the lounge. I peaked in and saw it was only Blaise and Theo. So I walked in carefully headed toward the kitchen.

"Mari!" Blaise jumped up,interrupting his conversation with Theo, "How was it?"

Hermione watched as Theo began fiddling with his hands, "It was fine. Nice actually. He's sweet."

"Yeah Charlie is a nice guy. I'm going to run and get a drink I'll be right back. Want anything?" Blaise asked over his shoulder.

"Butterbeer." Theo and Mari answered together.

Mari sat down on the couch wishing that she was twelve again. With all of this information maybe then she and Theo would have been closer friends. But she couldn't change that. All she could do was take a chance now.

"You're still coming to ball right?" Mari said as Theo messed with the set of wizards chess on the table.

"Yeah," he looked up suddenly, "of course. I wouldn't miss it for the world. Besides if I'm not there whose going to embarrass Blaise? You're too nice to do it." He smiled.

"You're right. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous." Theo looked up at me and smiled.

"Why are you?"

"There are just going to be lots of people there. And I feel like half of them hate me because of who I was. And the other half hate me because of who I am now." I pulled my shawl closer around me.

"I don't hate you. Neither does Draco. And besides people are going to think what they want. All you can do is be who you want to be."

"Yeah you're right." Mari felt calmer. Theo has a way of doing that to her.

A comfortable silence filled the air.

"So... Charlie?" Theo said with a chuckle.

"Yes, Charlie." My brows furrowed and I felt my lips draw close together as I hoped to understand my own feelings about the situation.

"He's a nice bloke. A little naïve at times but maybe that's just me." Theo said with a shrug.

"No I feel it too." I felt brows loosen, as I understood what Theo meant, "I think it might be that he didn't grow up here. In the middle of it all. He didn't grow up with all of the-"

I searched for the word. Or words.

What was it that we had grown up in?
Sure it was a war but it was more than that.
We had grown up in severely structured chaos.
A society with rules. But then we watched them crumble into disorder as even the most sound institutions in our lives were reduced to ashes.
We had our childhood ripped from our hands and replaced with sunken eyes and tired hearts and broken souls.

We had grown up looking over our shoulders. Whispering our dreams to ourselves hoping to keep them alive, but not wanted to speak them too loud. Lest they be crushed and consumed by the rage of those around us.

We had grown up. Too fast. And too hard. With the inability to go back.

We had grown up confused and lost. Told to make decision and be adults in situations we did not want or ask for.

Told to pick a side on a war bigger than ourselves for reasons we didn't quite understand.

Forced to think like soldiers instead of children. Commanders not friends. Vicious hexes not silly spells.

We had grown up without warning or preparation. Thrown into chaos. Into sleepless nights. Wondering if we would make it through the next few hours. Or if someone would kill us by then.