Trip Through time

Hogwarts once again

I curled up as I laid my head on the window. I cradled my shattered hand close to my chest as I tried to block out the memories forcing their way to my mind. I closed my eyes and I was there. He had blood dripping from his face with the scratch I gave him. He was beyond angry as he grabbed a baseball bat and held my hand against the floor. Over and over he hit my hand shattering the bones and causing blood to splatter everywhere.

Snapping over my eyes again a sighed and held tighter on to my hand. It was practically useless, the nerves in my hand had been destroyed and I could only use my thumb and pinkie finger, both being incredibly painful to move, the rest hanging limply, completely numb to the pain.

I had heavy glamours on covering every part of my contorted, disfigured body. I couldn’t let anyone see; not the pain; or the injuries; or the now marron blood which clung to my frame. I didn’t want to be a bother. I didn’t want to cause my friends pain. I didn’t want them to leave. Surely if they saw the true me and new everything they would leave. After all, who would be friends with someone like me?

I wasn’t sure how I was going to make it through this year. I knew I had already upset my friends by not going to the World cup with them. They would be mad. I wished I could have gone, but I wasn’t allowed out and the only reason I got to this train, at all, is because I climbed out of the window when my Uncle was at the bar. I was surprised when my Aunt gave me my stuff instead of shoving me back inside but glad nonetheless.

I let out a tired sigh as I closed my eyes only for them to snap open a second later.

I still felt cold. No matter what I did, how much I ate during my time at Hogwarts, or on my trips, I couldn’t gain any weight. Leaving me freezing in the autumn cold.

I was about to try and see if I could write with my left hand, when Ron throw open the door. “Harry! There you are! I was worried, you didn’t show up last week.”

I smiled at the familiar red head as he and Hermione walked in the carriage. I bit my lip at the mention of the cup but I answered all the same, “Yeah, I’m sorry about that. Something came up…”

My voice was horse and small. I tried to reason with myself as I spoke each quiet word that left my mouth. I kept telling myself they wouldn’t hurt me but I couldn’t stop the fear that tried to consume me.

“Are you okay mate?” Ron asked me as he sat beside me. I quickly bot my tongue to stop the whimper that raised in my throat.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I stated as they shared a worried look. “Really, I am.” They nodded at my slightly more convincing statement but still didn’t look convinced.

I was happy when Ron started talking about the cup as I was able to forget what had happened.

It all felt right, Away from the hell of ‘home’ or the pain of the trips. Going to the place I belonged, my true home.

I didn’t mind the noise of the great hall or the taunts of Malfoy. I was happy. I sat quickly through Dumbledore’s speech and I didn’t mind anything he said. I didn’t complain at the age restrictions on the Tournament as I was glad I wouldn’t be dragged into this and would have a relatively quiet year.

I found the students of Beauxbatons Academy a little strange but okay people who reminded me a little of Chloe’s school in early 19C France. Of course the Beauxbatons were magical unlike Chloe’s school which was for muggles.

I did not like the Durmstrang students as they were very loud. Each and every time they smashed their staffs on the ground I felt like I was being spent back there, back in that room, back to being locked and alone.

I flinched when I felt something touch my hand spending me spiralling back to reality. Ron was giving me a concerned look as I silently begged for the noise to stop.

My wish was granted but instead of giving me time to cool down, fate hated me, and decided to make one of the Durmstrang kids create a phoenix of fire which flew around the room. I practically jumped away from the fire as I clung onto Ron’s arm, instantly feeling safer knowing I was at Hogwarts not at ‘home.’

Ron silently calmed me down as I forced my breathing to even out.

Dumbledore, being Dumbledore, told all of us to stand up and sing the Hogwarts anthem. I retracted my arms as I curse myself. I forced myself to focus on singing instead of the boy behind me.

I silently laughed at the confused faces of the visitors and when we sat down we started to eat. I carefully choose my food to make sure I would be able to eat without throwing up.

“Harry, you alright now?” Ron asked me as a few of the Gryffindors looked at me.

“Y-yeah… sorry…” I murmured while nibbling at a sandwich.

I could feel the conversation Ron and Hermione were having with their eyes. I slowly curled in on myself feeling very self-conscious. I was thankful that only Ron noticed my full on mental break down but I also couldn’t help but be embarrassed at my actions and scold myself in my head.

The second I could I left the hall for the common room, suing my magic to change my clothes. I sighed happily while curling up under the warm sheets.

I didn’t realise how tired I was until now as my eyelids drooped as my heart beat slowed to an even rhythm. I let out a yawn as I let myself fall asleep, missing the worried conversation my friends were having downstairs.