I really wish that the therapist would have cleared me to go to rehab because I really needed it. I was terrified of relapsing and rightfully so because it end up happening. Since returning back to this life, I had no encountered any drugs so I thought I was strong then Stephen came into my life. I should have never flirted with him or even allowed him into my home.
For the past two weeks, I have been living in my hell. I have completely cut everyone out of my life because I'm ashamed of who I've become. Stephen has been coming to my home everyday with a different bag of drugs and we would spend the rest of the day getting high.
I was tainted. My home was tainted.
I splash my face with cold water as the water for my bath runs in the background. It is difficult being sober after being high with Stephen, I'm pretty sure that he is giving me laced drugs. I know what drugs feel and taste like, I used use them but these ones don't even feel the same. They're a lot stronger than what I'm used to and I know because one day my nose bled.
My hatred for Stephen continues to grow as I step into the bath. The water is ice cold and I shiver as I bend down, allowing myself to be engulfed by the water that overflows.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath before going under for a few seconds. I'm trying to cleanse myself of the drugs, I need to be sober.
Trying to become sober will be more difficult this time. Whenever I was sober I was jittery and the cravings for the next bag were high. I would find myself scratching at my skin, even cutting it with my nails as I waited for Stephen to arrive with the next bag.
I stay looking at the ceiling for the next few minutes until my phone rings. I reach for it and I furrow my brows at the number seeing as I don't recognise it.
"Hello." I lowly say as I answer the call.
"Kylie?" I breathe a sigh of relief at the sound of Zion's voice.
"Zion." I practically cry. "God, I miss you."
"I've been meaning to call but my therapist told me that it was too early to." I pull the phone even closer to my face as he speaks. "I've been thinking about you and I just want to thank you for sending me here. I'll pay you back once I'm out of here."
"The money doesn't matter." I mumble. "I did this for you."
"Thank you." He sounds so sincere. "How have you been?"
"Not good." I close my eyes as a tear slides down my face. "Not good at all."
"Kylie." He sighs, "What is going on?"
"I should have came with you." A few more tears slide down my face. "Zion, the devil came into my life and he ruined me."
"Kylie, what are you talking about?"
For a moment I feel like telling him everything but I remember where he is, he is still in rehab. I don't want to say anything that may trigger me so I tell him that I love him before hanging up the phone. I put my phone down on the floor before sliding it away from me as I submerge myself back in the water.
---
Once I'm dressed, I slowly make my way downstairs to my dining room. I blink a few times as I pull open the curtains before sliding my double french doors open, letting in the fresh air.
I take a moment to stand there and obverse my surroundings. I've been so blessed to have the money to purchase a home like this and live a life like I do but I've also been so foolish.
I look back in confusion as I hear my front door shut. It can't be Stephen because he doesn't have the keys to my home. I step out of sight as I hear the person walk towards the dining room.
