The Heart Of Ace

Chapter 49

I stared at the spot near my window.

A small piece of cement was chipped off. How many small pieces had to be chipped off for the whole building to fall?

Dr. A locked me out of the lab. I almost had him at lunch but he smiled at me before closing the door and just as I reached, he locked it from inside. He had the guts to smile at me. I hoped he saw my sticking out the tongue through the mirror.

I had no other distraction today. Liz left me for her tutor after an intense cuddle session. Jason was busy with his own studies.

Robbie.

Robbie was here. In our hotel room. Waiting for me.

I was not going. He wanted me for one thing and I was not delivering myself for that.

I hugged my pillow.

'The most precious gift my husband can ever give to me. His time.'

The words were haunting me. Why? I hated this. I suffocated myself in my pillow.

I wanted Robbie, not just in my bed. In my life. I wanted him to be only mine. His body, his soul, his heart, his emotions and his 'time'.

I needed all of it. But he did not care about that. He did not care about me.

I heard voices outside my bedroom.

Jason; he was on phone.

"Yes...I know...I told you already...I was in class..." I heard the door open "...he is here. Yes...looks like it...Yes Robert, I think he is sleeping...his phone is in silent...no, I do not live here and you know it."

Jason sighed.

"Look, Robert, why don't you let me talk to him...for the hundredth time, no, I do not have 'designs' for your 'angel'...then stop talking shit...no, I call him Dave or David or sometimes Davidson...Yes he is not mine... I will talk to him and get him talking to you...don't thank me, I am not doing it for you...bye..."

The bed dipped. I felt him sliding into the bed. Warm hand started to rub my back gently.

"Dave? Ready to talk about it?"

Tears came out of nowhere. I turned around and hugged him and sobbed.

"Shhh...let it all out...I am here."

I did not talk. I had no idea how to express what I was feeling. I sniffled. Tears left as fast they came. They just wanted to embarrass me.

"Why do I love him so much, Jace? Why him?" I could not get an answer.

Why was he married? Why was he older? Why did he not take me to see the sunset? I wanted to see the sunset with him. I wanted to go to Paris with him. I wanted him to buy me food after standing an hour in a queue.

I was angry.

I sat up and bit my pillow.

"Maybe because he was the one who saw you first?"

"Huh?"

"He was the first one to see the real you. For everyone else you are this intimidating person no one can get close to."

What was he talking about? Intimidating? Me? Ten pounds soaking wet, spaghetti arms me?

Jason chuckled. "Yes, Dave, you. You are intimidating. It took me two weeks to build up the courage to talk to you."

He was making fun of me. Jason looked like a gym rat when we first met, all those months ago. Jason was tailing someone who was gym addicted, to get him a job as a bouncer. He was stranded for cash. Now, he was well-defined but not like before.