Sanders Sides (and more) One Shots

The Big Spider

Patton POV

I was getting my eyes adjusted to the my glasses as I was starting to wake up. What was the first thing I saw? A big spider perched on the back of a chair. I couldn't scream since I didn't have much energy and it was too early for me to process the situation. I decided to get myself ready for the day in the bathroom connected to my room. It wasn't until I was in the middle of brushing my teeth that it clicked that there was a giant spider in my room and, if Virgil's book was correct before I passed out, it seemed like a Brazilian Wandering Spider. As if my generic fear of spiders wasn't bad enough, knowing that I was facing a spider that could give me all sorts of pain within 30 miniutes of a bite as well as a 4 hour long painful erection before death made me want to burn my room down.

I looked at the spider in the mirror and felt uncomfortable. I wanted to go to someone for help, but everyone else was likely to either be annoyed or scared themselves, so I just decided to keep my mouth shut. I decided it would be best if I avoided my room altogether and act like it wasn't bothering me; after all, there are actually times and places to repress feelings. With the snap of my fingers, I found myself in the kitchen and made breakfast for everyone.

The day wasn't so bad since I didn't usually go into my room often. Apart from Remus calling out to someone he called "Victor Green" and watching Roman and Virgil struggle to decide where on each other to put their hands, nothing felt out of the ordinary and I almost forgot about the big spider. Like I said, I almost forgot about it. Everyone was getting ready for bed and, while they all went to their rooms, I just stared at my door. I was about to open it until the large footsteps from the occupant's eight legs convinced me otherwise. I backed far enough so that it wouldn't hear me take deep breaths to evade a heart attack. I decided to fall asleep on the couch since I didn't see much harm in it, so I snapped my fingers again and was in my cat onesie holding a "puppy bear" as Emile called it (even though "Ned's Declassified" wasn't a cartoon). After summoning a blanket on myself, I fell asleep.

Logan POV

I was evidently tired when doing the last of my work for the day, but I was unable to actually fall asleep when I was in bed, even when I felt it was safe enough for me to sleep in my unicorn onesie. I decided to get out of my room and walk around the mind palace with a flashlight and the belief that surrounding myself with more reminders of the time of day would help me achieve my goal of slumber. I walked carefully so that I wouldn't risk waking up anyone else, but I froze as I was in the livingroom and saw the familiar ears of Patton's cat onesie. I carefully walked around the couch and confirmed that Patton was, indeed, sleeping on the couch. Unfortunately, he also had noticeable black eyeshadow under his eyes and a strong grip onto his stuffed animal leading to the conclusion that he was having a nightmare. I gently shook his shoulder a few times and he groaned before we made eye contact. He looked up at my head, but he said nothing.

"What are you doing up?" he asked me.

"I couldn't sleep. Why are you sleeping out here?" I retorted.

"Ummm...personal problems," Patton retorted before he turned away from me.

I was thinking about anything that could possibly be troublesome for him. After much thinking, I spoke up.

"It's either cats or spider decorations, right?" I questioned.

Patton sighed before he put himself in a supine position and looked at me with pleading eyes.

"I couldn't be alone with this spider. Please help me?" he responded with desperation in his voice and tears in his eyes.

I walked with Patton to his room and, step by step, he told me about what he saw and what information he remembered about it, which I was actually proud of him for. As we opened the door and carefully turned on the light, I noticed a crucial detail: Patton begged for me to kill the spider on the chair; he didn't tell me it was as big as the damn thing. It became clear how he knew what kind of spider it was and, for once, I actually felt nervous.

"Umm, Patton, when were you going to tell me the size of the Brazilian Wandering Spider?" I whispered.

"When you weren't likely to roll your eyes at my claim," he whispered back.

I couldn't bring myself to be mad at him since it made sense. Once it seemed that the spider acknowledged us, Patton passed out next to me and I carefully dragged him out of the room since I didn't want to startle the spider. It was the kind of spider that would hunt at night and be aggressive as a defense mechanism, so I didn't want to give it a reason to attack.

As I was bringing Patton to the kitchen to provide a cold rag for him, I saw more than I wanted to of Remus walking around and looking around.

"Did someone spike his cookie dough or something?" he asked me.

"There's a massive spider in his room and he passed out," I whispered the explanation.

Remus's eyes widened as I made sure to only look at his face. He rushed to Patton's room and I heard statements such as "Victor Green! There you are!", "You know you're only supposed to bite me!", and "Let's get you back to my room" before he got out of the room while walking by the spider. I tilted my head as I looked at the pair.

"This is the Victor Green you were looking for?" I asked.

"Well, duh, I would've only called him Velma Green if he were a girl spider," he answered.

After some thinking, I had some ideas on why he would keep a Brazilian Wandering Spider as a pet and felt so disgusted from the ideas that I didn't bother asking him. While they walked to Remus's room, I put a cool rag on Patton's head prepared to tell him it was safe to go to his room.