Sanders Sides (and more) One Shots

Logan's Been Howling Around

Since it was a relaxation day for Thomas, Logan took it upon himself to read for a while. After consuming the material from so many books that he imagined Matilda would both enjoy and dread, he decided to read a bit of "Little Red Riding Hood". Since it was a simple story, he spent less time actually reading the text and more time getting nitpicky towards the logic within the story. However, it was at that story where Logan's body decided to take advantage of feeling relaxed and succumb to slumber.

Meanwhile, Remus wandered down the hall groaning with boredom all while he had a mace up his butt and half-eaten deodorant in his hand. He wanted Logan to help him come up with some bright ideas, but stopped as he saw his nerd softly snoring. As he removed the book from Logan's lap, he couldn't help but chuckle as he thought of Logan's metaphorical boner for reading and how Logan only let him use the term in that context because of "The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian". He adored seeing Logan so calm and unaroused...it provided a blank drawing board for his antics to be scribbled on. It wasn't long before he formed into a dark green smoke that entered Logan's head.

Logan was walking around in a forest that felt somewhat familiar, but he couldn't put his finger on it. As he pushed his glasses onto his face, he noticed that he had more hair than usual on one hand, another hand, one arm, and eventually his whole body. He started to speculate that he had hypertrichosis before he connected the dots. He was in the woods and he had more hair on his body than humanly possible, so he was probably dreaming up "Little Red Riding Hood" and he was the wolf.

Although he was lucid dreaming, Logan started to think that the most logical thing to do would be to proceed with his role in the story. He hid in a bush as he heard a noise and saw what seemed to be Dahlia in a dress and red hood walking by with a basket in her hand. If not for the idea he gave Thomas that involved Little Red Riding Hood carrying mace, Logan would've eagerly jumped out of the bush to get his role over with. As soon as Dahlia Riding Hood passed the bush, Logan climbed out and looked around. With the help of some nature tips and extra handy senses, Logan was able to make his way to the cottage that he presumed housed the grandmother he had to disguise himself as which could either lead to a hilarious defeat, a twisted ending for both protagonists, or his own demise.

Once Logan made it to the cottage, he snapped his fingers and, much to his dismay, all he could summon was a red hood of his own size. He wasn't thrilled, but he realized that he might be stronger than his elder victim, so he might not have to worry too much. He knocked on the door, but what he didn't expect was the sight of his boyfriend with an entire hair of gray and wrinkles worn just right. He had a smirk on his face as he saw the stunned hooded wolf before him.

"Ooh, a wolf, just what the Duke ordered!" Remus gleefully stated before pulling Logan inside and shutting the door behind him.

Once Logan made his hood disappear and regained his composure, he looked at Remus while trying to keep an annoyed expression.

"Look, Remus, you may currently be a...GILF, but I have to go along with the story. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like you to hide somewhere so I can dress as you and scare Dahlia!" Logan demanded.

"So...I'm a GILF, huh? You know, my big beast, this is a lucid dream and the only ones who aren't figments of your imagination are you and I," Remus assured as he unbuckled his pants and removed his green and black night shirt revealing all that Logan had admired in his waking life and then some.
Logan growled in arousal and Remus immediately pulled his beast into the bed.
Before long, Dahlia Riding Hood walked into the cottage.

"Granddad, it's me, Red!" she called out.

She followed some weird noises and noticed what seemed to be a wolf growling in her granddad's bed. Before she could react, the wolf rolled to one side of the bed and revealed her granddad with seemingly no clothes, a layer of sweat, and messy hair.

"Once again, you outdid yourself," the wolf told him.

"I'd probably do the same to you," was the retort.

Pretty soon, the sound of thunder grabbed the attention of everyone in the room and they noticed a pouring rain that appeared thick and white.

Logan woke up in his chair in a shock and noticed a damp spot in his jeans as well as an evident bulge. He stomped off with a feeling that the events of his dream weren't just by chance.

"Remus!"