Photos [Luke Hemmings]

Chapter 10 - Son of a Bitch

i really liked writing this chapter idk why lololol

i saw my crush shirtless today. it was a bad day turned great.

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Chapter 10—Son of a Bitch

{ a u t u m n }

          When it came to boys, it’s safe to say that I was completely clueless.

          I’ve never really had a serious relationship before, only just flings and things. I’ve had meaningless hookups with the same boys, but it never led to anything else. Occasionally, the guy wanted something more, but as soon as I detected that it was going to lead him asking me out on a date or something, I’d blatantly end it before anything could happen.

          But this time, it was different.

          Sure, I’ve had crushes before and stuff, but I’ve never felt so weirdly attracted to someone before. Luke, of course, had somehow managed to change that. On more than one occasion, I’d find myself wanting to kiss and touch Luke, without even meaning to, and I hated it. I hated how I had so confidently claimed that I hated the boy when I first met him, and now I’m finding myself getting pulled more and more into his little web.

          I couldn’t help but let out a groan as all of my thoughts rushed together in my brain, creating a ball of nothing but confusion and questions. Luke and I had kissed about three times already, and there was almost always some sort of tension between us. Whether it is angry tension or—as Danielle says—sexual tension, I don’t know. I was just so lost, and it sucked when I couldn’t tell apart my feelings. I felt helpless.

          “Either you’re thinking really hard, or your chicken parmesan tastes like shit.”

          I was yanked away from my thoughts as Danielle’s voice flittered to my ears, and I looked at her with wide eyes before my gaze dropped to my half eaten food. Relaxing, I let out a sigh and let go of my fork, leaning back in my seat on my side of the booth.

          “What’s wrong?” Danielle instantly asked me, a worried frown setting on her face.

          My head leaned back as I looked up at the peach colored ceiling of the local diner, before sighing and looking back at Danielle. “I don’t know,” I admitted with a lazy shrug. “My brain is all kinds of fucked up right now.”

          “How so?” she eyed me, taking a bite out of her grilled chicken sandwich as she quirked an eyebrow.

          I bit my lower lip, thinking of a way to make sense of how to word my jumbled up thoughts. Danielle stared at me, waiting patiently for me to speak as she continued eating her food. Furrowing my eyebrows at nothing, I sat up in my seat, letting out a breath as I finally met Danielle’s gaze. “I think…” I began trailing off as I gathered my thoughts as I prepared to drop a bomb on Danielle. “I think that might, uh, like Luke.”

          Danielle blinked once, then twice, and then her eyes widened as she squealed. “I knew it!” she exclaimed, grinning like a madman. “Jesus—it’s about time you fucking accepted it.”

I rolled my eyes. “Jeez—I’m sorry for taking my time to decide something extremely strange and new for myself.”

Danielle shook her head while sipping her soda, shooting me a disappointed look. “This wouldn’t be strange or new if you were more open about your feelings.”