Its funny how I couldn't do a simple thing.
They told me I was worth nothing.
Each and every time I thought I had the courage to do something,
They remind me again and again I was not an important human being.
No one can change the fact that I am insecured.
Its like I'm some kind of illness or disease that cannot be cured.
I was frightened and it's so hard, it's suffocating.
It feels as if my lungs just stopped functioning.
I was slowly losing my mind and sanity.
There were times I start to act wildly, it was really unlike me.
I come home after a long day at school, happy and full of excitement,
I go back into my room crying, pulling my hair out, they look at me full of disappointment.
My peers would pity me and tell me its going to be fine,
But in my head, I would think I could never feel this pain ever again if I just died.
I was never the same,
I was never the little girl who would laugh and was clumsy,
I could never be tamed,
I could never stop this pain, permanently.
Do people ever think of me?
Do they ever wonder out of curiosity?
Do they never want to help a poor girl like me?
Are they planning to leave me in an asylum as if I belonged there, was I crazy?
What do they even say?
Do they ever wonder what made me this way?
- 02.09.2019 -
YOU ARE READING
The Chaos In My Mind
PoesiaTo everyone wondering what the hell is happening in my head. All these poems were written after i remembered, Remembered the pain I've been through, Reminded of how cruel this world was, Thinking I needed to let it out. I was once a little girl...
