Mean Girls: The Musical Oneshots

Janis and the Llama™

Cady stumbled out of the office building, nearly tripping over the first step. "Have a good day!" Her coworker, Veronica, called. Cady grunted in response. She clicked the button on her keys. Once, twice, and then a third time. She frowned. "Come on." She hissed, furiously hitting the button. Giving up, she scoured the parking lot for her vintage Chevrolet Bel Air. 

After ten minutes, she spotted its familiar navy blue coloring. "Wish I owned a motorbike." She muttered, pulling open the car door and slamming it shut. She steered onto the highway, then saw the massive flood of cars. Cady gripped the wheel so tightly her knuckles whitened. She leaned back in her seat, thumping her head on the headrest. 

When traffic cleared, she was twenty minutes later than she had said she would be. She spared a moment to text Janis. 

Itroars: Got stuck in traffic. Will be home soon. 

It'stherussians: OK! Take as much time as you need! Actually, take more time than you need. Get milk from the store or something.

 Cady was immediately suspicious. She turned left onto their street. She parked her car in the driveway and hurried to the house. She fumbled with her keys and inserted it into the lock. "Janis?" She called, locking the door behind her.  "Is everything okay?" A door slammed. "YES!" Janis yelled. "Everything is-ouch-fine! Stop eating my hair!" Cady, now extremely concerned, ran up the stairs. "Janis?" She opened the door. "Jan-" she stopped, and stared. 

There, in the middle of their bedroom, stood a llama. A large, fluffy, brown llama who was gnawing on a chunk of Janis' hair. She grinned sheepishly. "You weren't supposed to be here yet." Cady blinked dumbly. "Why is there a llama in our house?" Janis chewed on her bottom lip. "You said you wanted a pet." Cady laughed incredulously. "I did not mean a llama! Where did you get it?" Janis chuckled nervously. "Him actually. Umm, you don't want to know." Cady gave her the Stare of Death. "Janis..." she said warningly. "I may have possibly kinda sorta stolen it from the zoo." 

Cady's jaw dropped. "You-you stole a llama from the zoo?" Janis nodded. "Jan, we have to return him." The brunette flung her arms around his neck. "Noooo! His name is Rum Tum Tugger and we have to keep him. Pleeeease." Cady shook her head firmly. "Zoo. Let's go." Janis sulkily followed her out of the house. 

"Janis, how did you get the llama here?" She pointed wordlessly to the little red wagon leaning against the curb. And that was how Cady, a professional lawyer, came to be dragging a llama along the road in a wagon, with a brooding Janis stomping behind her. The next day, they went out and bought a cat, which Janis named Rum Tum Tugger the Llama. Janis was banned from the zoo, and the personnel there know to call security if they spot her. She found this hilarious and created a plaque for herself. She proudly hung it on the wall. Fugitive From the Zoo, It reads. Cady was not at all amused.