𝘛𝘳𝘢𝘶𝘮𝘢, 𝘛𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘥𝘺 - 𝙂𝙧𝙚𝙮'𝙨 𝘼𝙣𝙖𝙩𝙤𝙢𝙮 (ON HOLD)

eighteen - "LVAD" - eighteen

"People have scars. In all sorts of unexpected places. Like secret road maps of their personal histories. Diagrams of all their old wounds. Most of our wounds heal, leaving nothing behind but a scar. But some of them don't. Some wounds we carry with us everywhere and though the cut's long gone, the pain still lingers. What's worse, new wounds which are so horribly painful or old wounds that should've healed years ago and never did? Maybe our old wounds teach us something. They remind us where we've been and what we've overcome. They teach us lessons about what to avoid in the future. That's what we like to think. But that's not the way it is, is it? Some things we just have to learn over and over and over again."
-Meredith Grey, S3E18, "Scars and Souvenirs"

"Surgeons always have a plan. Where to cut, where to clamp, where to stitch. But, even with the best plans complications can arise, things can go wrong. And suddenly, you're caught with your pants down. The thing about plans is they don't take into account the unexpected, so when we're thrown a curve ball, whether its in the OR or in life, we have to improvise. Of course, some of us are better at it than others. Some of us just have to move on to plan B and make the best of it. And sometimes what we want is exactly what we need. But sometimes, sometimes what we need is a new plan."
-Meredith Grey, S3E19, "My Favorite Mistake"

"A patient's history is as important as their symptoms. It's what helps us decide if heart burn's a heart attack... if a head ache's a tumor. Sometimes patients will try to re-write their own histories. They'll claim they don't smoke, or forget to mention certain drugs... which in surgery can be the kiss of death. We can ignore it all we want, but our history eventually always comes back to haunt us. Some people believe that without history, our lives amount to nothing. At some point we all have to choose: do we fall back on what we know, or do we step forward to something new? It's hard not to be haunted by our past. Our history is what shapes us... what guides us. Our history resurfaces time after time after time. So we have to remember sometimes the most important history is the history we’re making today."
-Meredith Grey, S3E20, "Time After Time"

"As interns, we know what we want, to become surgeons. And we'll do anything to get there. Suffer through killer exam, endure one-hundred hour weeks, stand for hours on end in operating rooms, you name it, we'll do it. The tough part, though, is reconciling this huge thing we want to be surgeons with everything else we want. Too often, the thing you want most is the one thing you can’t have. Desire leaves us heartbroken, it wears us out. Desire can wreck your life. But as tough as wanting something can be, the people who suffer the most are those who don’t know what they want."
-Meredith Grey, S3E21, "Desire"

Addison looked at Anna, who was just now getting some sleep, and down at her meter which flashed 338 in the dark hotel room. It seemed that her honeymoon period of great blood sugar levels and easy management was finally over. Addison filled a syringe with her correction dose of insulin to hopefully get her back into range. She turned on the lamp next to Anna's bed and wiped Anna's stomach with an alcohol wipe. Once it dried, she pinched her skin, injecting the insulin as Anna slightly stirred, "Stay still, sweetheart. I'm giving you a shot."

"What time is it?" Anna asked, yawning, sleep written all over her face.

"It's almost time to wake up." Addison told her, discarding Anna's syringe in her home sharp's container, "Your blood sugar is still high. It's taking forever to come down."

"I don't wanna get up," Anna protested.

"I know." Addison told her, "You've barely slept. You only got about 3 hours of sleep, but I've got work soon."

"Maybe a shower will wake me up." Anna sat up, stretching her arms and rubbing her eyes, "I'll eat later."

"Okay." Addison turned on the main light as Anna got up. She texted Derek her blood sugar number, the correction dose, and what they'd be eating for breakfast.