Rekindled

Chapter 10

Planning the funeral proved to be more difficult than I'd anticipated. Rick had always said, that if he ever died, he would want his body cremated. His parents strongly disagree! They feel that a body is sacred, and needs to be treated with respect, and that meant with a proper burial. Despite what Rick wanted, I decided to go with his family's wishes. We set reservations for an open casket, and an open funeral for anyone that wished to attend. Rick was quite reserved, and that made it hard to know who his friends were. As for flowers, Rick's mother Linda, wanted red roses. I thought white roses would be more appropriate. We ended up choosing both.

The day of the funeral came quickly, and knowing that this would be the day Rick would be buried made it hard to breathe. I wasn't ready to say goodbye. Saying goodbye to a marriage was different than saying goodbye to a life. Putting on a straight face I walk into the church building for the viewing. So far no guests have arrived, and it's just Rick's family and I. Walking up to his casket I stare at his lifeless face. Uncontrollable, the tears fall, and my whole body starts to hyperventilate. Linda pulls me in for a hug. I always loved Linda! She welcomed me into the family right away, and loved me as one of her own.

As the time draws near for guests to arrive, Rick's family and I line up beside the casket to greet the guests. Keeping my eyes to the ground I don't feel as if I can make eye contact with anyone. Soon Linda gasps, and I look up to see what's causing her response. I watch in horror as one by one the guests spit on Rick's body. Without thinking I close the casket, and with anger in my voice announce that the viewing is over. Unable to control my emotions I tell everyone to leave the room. They all look at me confused, and a man I don't know starts to speak.

"You're his wife? You of all people should know the type of man your husband was. I hope he burns in Hell."

All the people nod their heads in agreement. Everyone begins speaking in rage about the ways Rick had wronged them, and how the world is a better place without him. Unable to hold it in anymore I tell them all to be silent. "Rick was my husband, and yes, I know he's not perfect, but I will not stand by, and let you disrespect his memory. Now, if you have nothing nice to say I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

One by one people start to leave. As the crowd thins my eyes come in contact with Brad's. Quickly looking away I shift my eyes back to Rick. I've been avoiding Brad the last few days. With me being a suspect in Rick's murder, I figured our affair would only stir things up. Brad makes his way over, and brings Linda in for a hug.

"Thank you Brad! You were always a good friend to Rick."

Brad continues to give his condolences to the rest of Rick's family. When he gets to me, he holds out his hand. Placing my hand in his, he gives it a firm shake.

"I'm deeply sorry for your loss."

I shift my eyes to his, and respond with a quiet thank you. He holds my gaze a little longer before releasing my hand, and walking over to Rick. After a few moments, he turns to sit down. Placing his arms on his knees he buries his face in his hands. The sadness in his expression was evident. Averting my gaze, I watch as a few more strangers make their way over to Rick.

It isn't long before we begin the memorial service. Each of Rick's family shares some memorable experiences with Rick, and how he impacted their lives for the better. When it's my turn to share a few words I struggle to get up from my seat, and slowly make my way to the mike. Staring over the crowd my eyes find Brad. He's looking at me with tears in his eyes, and I look away to try and find the words I wish to express. "Rick knew what he wanted, and how to get it. It was a powerful gift he possessed. Everything he created for himself in this life, he earned. He was envied by most for his success, and yet I never noticed him look down toward anyone. When I first met him, I thought he was the most handsome man I had ever seen.  He noticed me at a time in my life when I felt invisible. He knew how to make me feel special. Our marriage wasn't perfect, but I will say this... Rick was a fighter! He fought for what he wanted, and he fought for those he loved. I will always love him. I am grateful for the time we shared together. May you Rest In Peace my love."