Rage is the Colour Green (Tododeku-Completed)

Fire Burns Hotter when HE'S Near

Midoriya Izuku was ready to heal.

Since the run-in with Kenichi, he could count on one hand the number of times he had gone outside. Actually, he couldn't, because he hadn't gone anywhere.

But he was ready now. Aizawa was going with him to ensure he would be okay. No one truly trusted him after the last time he had been out.

He decided to wrap up warm because there was a chill in the air that he could feel from the breeze coming through his open window. Izuku met Aizawa in the common room, everyone calling out to them as they walked out of the door.

Izuku was quiet throughout most of the journey, a lot of his energy being taken up through trying not to panic at being outside. Every person they passed had some feature that sparked memories of the past. He desperately tried to push them back down, down into the oceanic area that was his thoughts.

Aizawa had noticed this and every now and then his hand would brush Izuku's back. Midoriya was grateful for how kind his teacher actually was. Izuku was glad for this kindness, otherwise, he didn't know how many pieces he would have splintered into.

They continued on to the shops, eventually striking up a conversation about the past few days. Izuku debated telling his teacher about his nightmares, but... he didn't want to bother him. Plus he knew how to stay quiet. He had learned that many years ago.

"So how have you been Midoriya?" Aizawa asked the question when their conversation came to a lull. Izuku swallowed quickly before answering.

"I've been feeling better, but it's still... hard," Izuku said, hating how his voice pattered off into a mumble near the end. Luckily for him, Aizawa had certainly become versed in the 'Midoriya mumbles' saga, so he picked it up.

"Well, you have been doing really well. I don't know exactly what happened with you when you went for ice-cream, but you just need to know, you can tell me anything. I don't judge. I've listened to Mic whine over his own problems for years, I can handle a few more." Aizawa cracked a rare smile near the end. Izuku felt happier just hearing him say he could trust him, but he wished he could believe it.

"Aizawa-sensei... um, I have a-a question."

"What is it kiddo?"

"Well, um... do you think I'm... weak?"

"What are you talking about Midoriya? Why would I think that?"

"Most heroes don't really have this many problems so early into their career, and I just want to know if I can actually do it because my whole life I was told I couldn't and now because I have a quirk I'm being told I can. It's such whiplash, like was I actually useless when I had quirk? What if I get triggered while trying to save someone, and then they get hurt because of me, or I hurt myself too much to be useful, then what would people think? Would they think I was a terrible person, I mean, I do try to save everyone, and I have been trying my best, but sometimes it's hard. Like when I break my bones, sometimes I feel as if I deserve it and I know I shouldn't but it's hard not to. Because if I knew how to control my quirk better I would be able to help more, but I can't and I'm trying, I am, but things keep seeming to crop up, more and more things where I have to learn more and I don't know how to keep putting on a smile when every day it feels faker. Am I weak for believing that I should just give up?"

Izuku really hadn't meant to ramble on and on, but it had just happened. All of his thoughts, that had been on his mind since he received his quirk, came pouring out of his mouth in a big spiel. He glanced at Aizawa and almost ran away after seeing the surprise and shock written clearly across his face. He forced himself to stay put as Aizawa processed his thoughts.