Youniverse

29 | She is Me

"She is Me"

She is tired
of living for necessity:
waking up,
because she has to;
eating,
because she has to;
faking her feelings,
because she has to
feel something
in order to remind herself
that she is alive.
People would always
make her feel bad,
unwanted
worthless
and easy to dump.

Sometimes she's thinking
that she only has this lifetime
so she should make
the most out of it
and chill to the fullest.
But at the end of every day,
no matter how much
she tried to shove the thought
of vanishing and completely disappearing away
she still ends up
crying in her palms
asking herself what's wrong
when everything seemed so right.

She was so fed up
of crying and overthinking
that she had thought of
diverting it to physical pain
so she grabbed the splendid, sharp thing
then started to draw
lines in her skin,
letting it go deeper
even beyond her flesh
if possible.

She's no suicidal,
but she's tired
so she made a poem
to kill some time.
She's still convincing herself
that it was a poem
that she created and not
a farewell message
but if ever it is
a farewell message,
she wanted everyone to know that
she
is
me.

ーl.b.