a year full of life

beauty of a goodbye

"how did you ever learn to love goodbyes?"

the question rang in my head as he let my mind simmer, this trip had brought up so much questioning and yearning and we weren't even to our destination yet.

"i think the thing i love about a goodbye rather than see you later is it allows for healing and then eventually new beginnings. it helps all the bitterness pass, it allows everyone a second chance. if you choose to say goodbye you're choosing not to move on, you're letting yourself dwell on the fact that you're going to miss that person rather than how amazing of a new beginning you're going to have when you meet again." the car remained silent after my answer and i could tell he was having a hard time processing my train of thought, letting a touch of hurt morph his features.

"but the difference between saying goodbye to someone you love and saying see you later is that you're making real the fact that you may never see them again..." hurt cracked his voice as he answered.

"but isn't that the beauty of living, not knowing what's coming next?" with an open road and a quiet car, only the buzz of a radio playing some nonsensical pop song filling the static, we let our words seep into each other's skin: one of us too scared to let go and the other aching for a new beginning - both holding onto rotten hope of a place better than here.