a year full of life

if i look past the clouds, will the stars gaze back?

when i look up at the sky
[beyond all of the clouds]
and see the stars so bright and shining,
i hope that one of these days,
they'll look right back -
and that maybe it will fill
the hole that's in my chest
[the one that feels like losing control]
maybe they'll have the answers
to carry all this ache

[but really, maybe, they already have -
maybe they smiled so brightly
that they burnt out
but then by the time
it could ever reach me,
i was already long gone,
and their existence too faded
to leave a mark]

we talk a lot of the universe
and our small existence inside of it,
[as if the sun and the moon
aren't made of the same dust as us]
but we never stop to think that maybe
they gaze right back,
thinking that maybe it's but a speck
in the grand scheme of /our/ lives.

i fell in love with the stars
the day i realized
they were all i had left.
i fell in love with the sun
the moment i felt
she was the light i needed.
i fell in love with the moon
the instance i ached
for just a little bit of hope.
and i fell in love with you
the second i knew
you were all of the galaxies
playing right inside my mind,
mixed into one
[you were my sun in the morning
my moon in the evening
and the stars gazing back at me
when i felt alone;
my love will always be rooted deeper
than any grave and even if i fade away
-and your light does too-
our impact will last a lifetime.
in the end, our decay will feed the bloom]