Crystal Clear - Treasure Chest Reviews & Graphics [Hiring/Open]

Sullen (DKE)

Title: Sullen

Author: LavenderSkies7

Genre: Romance/Supernatural

Tags: adult, anxiety, blackwoman, cancer, danger

Blurb:

Twenty-one-year-old Drew discovers that she has a brain tumor. Caught up in a web of hallucinations, it brings back memories from her past.
Her best friends Lisa Rowan and River Harlow are there to be her backbone as she fights through her illness. That's not the only thing she has to worry about there's a dangerous path ahead of her.
She meets a man named Alec Patel that instantly catches her attention. There's something about this man, she can't quite read him.
A man is waiting for her in the shadows of vengeance that's full of envy.

💎 Reviewer: dke0618

Review:

Title: 5/5

I believe this is the perfect title for this story. It showcases Drew's life so far perfectly. It seems she has had nothing to really be happy about in her life, but I hope that changes.

Cover: 5/5

This cover is very nicely done and portrays your main character perfectly!

Blurb: 2/ 5

I would consider rewriting your blurb. In my opinion, it starts out great and then becomes confusing. I would definitely reword the last sentence because it doesn't make sense and leaves the reader confused.

Grammar, vocabulary, punctuation: 5/15

There are several puntuation errors. I also noticed incomplete sentences, lack of commas, and flip flopping from past tense to present.

Worldbuilding: 10/20

I think you explained Drew's life very well. The flashbacks of her past left me feeling heartbroken for her. I hope the poor girl can catch a break soon! My only suggestion is maybe try to cut down on some of your explanations of her actions. It became hard to stay focused on the story with all of the step by step actions of the character. You may could try giving us an idea of what she's doing instead of every action she makes.

Plot development: 18/20

The plot is a little slow at unfolding but is still a very solid one!
Character development: 20/20
Your main character is unfolding fantastically. The flashbacks and emotional issues you revealed gave your readers a personal insight to her everyday struggle. She is a very relatable character, so well done!

Originality: 8/10

Nothing about this story really stuck out to me as unique, but its only three chapters in so its too soon to tell!

Hook: 8/10

The prologue caught my interest immediately! Unfortunately, the next few chapters seemed stiff due to the step by step actions. Chapter three pulled me back into the story so I can tell it's going to be great! I would advise editing the first two chapters to keep the interest and flow going.

Summary: 81/100

This story has great potential! I believe with a little bit of editing this will be a very popular story! Thank you for the opportunity to review your book! I look forward to seeing more of your work in the future.