The Dark Abyss

December 18, 2004

Between this and the job, I feel like the job has more consequences than anything else to be honest and with this on my back, I guess you could things got a little bit harder than it should be.

I can't even tell my family because it would only put them in danger and I can't tell anybody else because they would be in danger too.

I guess I am just dumb to tell anyone and this loneliness is something on its own, just when I thought things would get less depressing, there comes this book ready to make my already horrible job a misery.

Funny really, everything is funny at this point, I mean like this entire thing...

Hope, what hope do I have???!!!

This life has been treating me like shit, since the day I was born and yet I go on every day with no understanding of what drives me to this point and at this point now that I think about, I can't really remember the last time I cared about something.

My family doesn't treat me with the respect I need and it shows little care of what I do and they are really just here for the money I can offer, my wife looked at me since the day we first met with the same look of pity and my children thought they are adopted they are so similar to my wife that it to a point that I can't even understand why I was even born at this point, just to go on and on everyday work and harder just to earn a small amount of money to be spent by those spoiled wife and kids and to be disrespected every day with it just to die one day losing every happy as little as may be and every sad memory I ever had and my experiences never passed on and my life just a normal office-man.

It's all just stupid really and now that I am talking about this, I feel happy that somebody would care enough to give me an early death where I can finally be rid of this disastrous life.