The Three Kings

Chapter 10

"I have had horrible nightmares ever since. Last night I dreamed I was shot but there were no wounds.
I kept having to convince people there were bullets breaking up my backbone.
My subconscious is a lazy poet.

I have no right to be this tragic, to have a brain like a broken record.
It is unfair to those with reason to suffer.
The worst has already happened to me and I have tried so hard to be whole again.
To wake up every morning. To buy groceries. To look at strange mens' strong hands without half wishing them dead.

I am terrified of what's inside me. My organs are such ugly things.
They twist and rupture and fail.
The good news is we are all like this.
I'm not sure this is good news."
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Hanna
——————

They left early that afternoon.

Standing off to the side in the living room, I watched as the two of them came downstairs with bags in their hands. It hit me then; this was it, they were leaving. They were going to walk out that door, get in their car and drive away. They were going to leave. They were going to drive thousands of miles away from me, across an entire ocean, and to another continent, to another country. Thousands and thousands of miles away from me.

Why did that thought affect me so much?

I watched Alexander come down the stairs and set his bags down by the door and move over to talk with Alpha John. I watched him until I heard the front door open and then close. My head whipped around so fast, I was surprised I didn't snap my neck. I didn't see who left, but Xavier was no longer in the room and Alexander's bags were gone.

Practically sprinting to the window, I saw Xavier walking down our driveway and towards the black SUV. He reached the back of the car and opened the trunk, tossing the bags in the back and then move around to the side of the car and...disappear from view.

Gone. He was gone.

A low whimper passed through my lips.

My heart began to beat frantically in my chest. I could feel the rapid fluttering of it. The panic had slowly started to set in. My heart ached for him to come back. My soul had reached out to him. My body--my entire body was reacting negatively to his leaving--to his disappearance and it wanted him back.

I continued to stare out of the window, hoping that he would come back and say goodbye, but he never did. He stayed in that car, and it felt like my entire being was just going to crumble. Tears had begun to prick the back of my eyes, I had to force them down. I refused to cry in front of King Alexander and over a man I had just met; over a man that was supposed to mean nothing to me.

"Hanna," I heard Alpha John's voice call to me.

I inhaled deeply to calm my racing nerves and scrubbed my face to try and get rid of any unusual redness that may be apparent.

"Hmm?" I turned my head.

"Come say goodbye to the King," he beckoned me over.

I came to stand next to Alpha John. My eyes were cast downwards, mainly because I was afraid to look at him. I bowed before him, in an awkward curtsey way. "It was an honor and a privilege to meet you, Sir. Please express the same to your brother. It has been...an exciting weekend."

"It was a delightful weekend if I do say so myself. It was a pleasure to meet you, Hanna. The food you had prepared was absolutely lovely and quite delectable. I hope that one day we shall meet again, and I hope that one day is soon." He said.

I could hear the underlying message in his words. He knows what his brother and I had talked about.

Finally finding the courage, I looked up at him and gave him a shy smile whilst trying to memorize every detail of his face. I still couldn't believe that this would be the last time that I would be seeing him (For a week at least). I wanted to integrate everything in my brain. At least if I remembered him, maybe I wouldn't miss his brother so much. The longer that I gazed at him, the more gorgeous he became and the more it hurt. Maybe one day I'll have the guts to tell him how beautiful he is.