Have a Little Faith

Dakota's POV

Dakota's POV

I was making up lame excuses, trying to convince myself that I didn't need to go sleep just yet. I had showered extensively, rearranged my bookshelf, sketched small pictures and listened through two of my playlists. At quarter to one j felt the fatigue kicking in and reluctantly changed into my shorts and over sized T-shirt. I slumped towards my bed and crawled under the large blanket pulling it up to my nose. After my visit to Levi I had walked home and successfully managed to keep all memories away. But now when the house was dark and quiet I felt the images flood my mind again.

'Keep a small light on' Levi's words rang in my ear. I reached over and switched on the small lamp, hesitantly flicking off the large light. I settled back into my pillows and took a deep breath. In and out. After some time my mind was focusing solely on my slightly raspy breathing. I slowly closed my eyes and prayed that sleep would come faster than the flashbacks.

I felt like I was being pulled under, as if a strong hand was tugging at my legs preventing me from reaching the surface. Although I was in the water my throat was dry like sandpaper, making swallowing difficult. I tried moving my arms or shouting for help, but the the water was keeping me stiff and quiet. I broke out in a cold sweat, my hands trembling as I frantically tried getting to the top. with one strong pull I was dragged further down into the darkness and cold of the ocean.

I shot up in bed, my covers tightly wrapped around my body like a cocoon. I had to slap my hand in front of my mouth to prevent cry from escaping my lips. The dream had been too realistic. I peered around the semi dark room clutching my damp forehead. I had only slept for one and half hours. I swing my legs out bed and walked to the bathroom. I tied my hair in a bun and splashed ice cold water in my face hoping to wash away the remains of the dream. I had to sleep more than one and half hours else my body wouldn't function tomorrow. I silently passed down the steps, entering the kitchen where the medicine cupboard hung on the wall. I took out the sleeping pills, turning over the lilac packet in my hand. The last time I had used these had been three years ago. I shook my head tryingn to clear my thoughts. I grabbed a water bottle and headed back upstairs. When I had shook out the covers once straightening my crumpled bed sheet I lay back down popping a pill into my mouth and washing it down with water. It took ten minutes for the medicine to kick in, and my eyes finally shut before I thought about yesterday evening again.

∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆«∆

It had been two weeks since the incident. My nights were still plagued with horrendous nightmares that shared me with many sleepless hours of staring at the small lamp on my bedside table. I had to already change the bulb once from the extensive usage.

School had started again and I was glad for the distraction it provided. I only had four more months, then I would graduate, so I focused completely on school work. I didn't tell any of my friends about the evening or the full details of the accident three years ago, preferring their state of unknowing than that of constant reassurance and pity. My parents had stopped trying to lecture me and my mom only occasionally asked me again why I had down it.

It was a Saturday and I was sitting in Starbucks sipping my caramel frappucino (absolute most awesomest drink ever to be invented) trying to focus on my book over the clattering of cups and the chattering of the other coffee goers. I was sitting at my window seat which overlooked the broad walk on which many people milled about, their colorful clothes and swimming wear providing a pretty sight. The café was nicely cooled down and soft music was playing, wafting through the coffee aroma air. It wasn't too busy and not too loud, just homey and cozy. I sighed eventually giving up of the book and setting it on the table and instead focusing on the people walking by. Couples passed who were strolling along hand in hand, families with children running around, people who walked their dogs. It was peaceful a strong contrast to the mess of emotions and memories inside me. Somebody walked by who looked familiar, only to retrace their steps and stop in front of the large window I was sitting by. Levi smiled through the window waving at me. His hair was wet and the yellow shirt clung to his damp body. I mustered a small smile and wove back. I thought he wouldn't have remembered me, he saved lives frequently from what I had heard yet he stood outside looking at me. His face pulled into a worried frown and he gave me a thumbs up, asking if I was okay. I meekly nodded my head, although if he looked closely he would be able to see my red tired eyes. When I gave him the answer he had hoped for he grinned at me again and waved goodbye. I returned the gesture and watching his broad back retreat down the creaking wooden planks. He was handsome that was for sure. My last boyfriend had been in ninth grade before things went wrong, and since then I had shut people out of my life, afraid that I would lose them too. Levi had a friendly face and a sunny smile that made you feel welcomed instantly, quite the opposite of me. My red curls framed my oval face. I had green eyes that had lost their sparkle three years ago. Black rimmed glasses rested on my button nose and freckles dusted my cheeks. My pale skin and large eyes displayed my shy personality and people often looked past me or steered for the loud open people, not me. I finished my drink before heading back home to finish my science project.