chapter : 23

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Yeosang's point of view

Once the two WWE wrestlers and I return back to Seonghwa's house I look for the neosporin to put on Cina's scratch. She walks right pass me and I grab her hand, she immediately snatches away making me frown.

Cina: Don't touch me.
Me: What?

I reach for her again and she shoves my hand away. Seonghwa walks up and she does the same to him.

Cina: Don't touch me!

She runs upstairs to her room slamming the door behind her.

Me: What was that?
Seonghwa: I honestly don't know.

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Giselle's point of view

San and I sit in complete silence. I pull the pack of frozen peas off my face before tossing it on the coffee table.

San: I don't know what to say.
Me: Silence was better than that.
San: Don't be a bitch right now this is your fault.
Me: My fault? She attacked me as if I did fuck him.
San: Technically you did fuck him.
Me: They weren't together. And that's even more reason for her to calm down, I had him first.

San blinks.

San: Well..
Me: Well what?
San: She had him first.

What is he talking about?

San: Our first year of college, they had a threesome long before you met him.

Of fucking course they did.

San: Pushing that aside let's be honest here, why? That's something I would expect from me but not you. Is it because of what mom said?

San and I never talk about the issues she and I have, But I guess once it gets to this point it's about time.

Me: When you've been told something for so long you start to believe it. Ever since I was twelve this lady has been saying I'll never be anything, I'll never be worthy of a guy in high standing. I was a kid San.

Mental abuse is a very hard thing to heal from.

Me: Hearing that everyday of my life grew a plant of insecurity within me. Why do you think I live like this? Because I genuinely believe this is what I deserve.

He shakes his.

San: It's not what you deserve.
Me: I say those words to myself at least five times a day and guess what? Our mother's voice will always be louder than mine.

Crying in front of my younger brother was the last thing I've ever wanted to do, I wanted to be something worth looking up to but I'm anything but that.

San: She ruined your life.
Me: I don't want to be a victim. I don't want to be that girl with mommy issues.
San: But you are and it is what it is. Our mom is a horrible person, this I know. She never said she loved us growing up and dad was always too busy to be around.

He scoffs.

San: Our childhood was very unfortunate, and the way we act shows that. It's not fair on us but it's really not fair to the people we come in contact with.

I raise an eyebrow.

San: Wooyoung is a victim of the Chois, Cina is a victim, every last girl I fucked or every dude you fucked, my friends, shit even my professors can't wait til I get the hell away from this college. We're toxic Giselle.

The truth hurts.

Me: So what do we do?
San: We fix it.

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child this is only the beginning..

if you're wondering what's going on with our girl Cina well,, think back to what happened to her a book or so ago..

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