The Daddy (book 4 of the kink series)

chapter : 37

San's point of view

I spent two hours at the jewelry store trying to find the perfect necklace for Raven. Jewelry and I haven't always had the best luck, thanks a lot Cina, but hopefully this time it'll be different.

On my way out the mall I run into a very familiar face. When I use to see her a wave of emotions would flood over me, now when I see her I feel nothing.

No anger, no love, no guilt.

Saelee: Ah, hello.
Me: How are you?

She shrugs her shoulders.

Saelee: I'm good.

She's lying, she looks like she wants to break down in tears as we speak. She messes with her hair nervously not knowing what to say, she's so different from her brother. Yeosang would've walked away by now.

Me: Do you have time to talk?

Her eyes widen in surprise.

We head towards the food court to grab a smoothie, she sits across from me at the table not knowing what to say.

Saelee: What did you want to talk about?
Me: This talk wasn't for me, it's more so for you. I don't have anything to say.

She sighs shaking her head.

Saelee: I hurt a very precious person. Jongho was a saint, an angel. He was so patient with me throughout my whole recovery. Whenever anyone at our old school would bring up my scars he was immediately there to defend me.

He eyes begin to water and I hand her a napkin.

Saelee: It's not fair to put all the blame on you for what I went through because I was a mess before you met me. I just was pretty decent at hiding it.

She pats the tears falling from her eyes. I don't say anything, I just listen letting her vent out all her frustrations.

Saelee: All I wanted was for you to love me and care about me the same way I did for you.
Me: I did Jewel, I just didn't know how to show it. And that's when it falls on me for hurting such an amazing person like you. I hurt you and you hurt Jongho.

Hurt people tend to hurt people.

I pray to God Jongho doesn't hurt his next partner.

Saelee: He moved out, he's at Cina's house for a while. And then that's awkward because my brother is madly in love with her and she fucking hates me.

Cina might be pissed and annoyed with Saelee but I don't think she hates her.

Saelee: It's like I'm just here in Korea floating around. I don't have any friends, I don't like bothering Yeosang while he's happy, I don't have Jongho and I don't have you. What the hell am I suppose to do?

I hold her hand from across the table to stop her from shaking.

Me: There comes a point in everyone's life where we have to own up to what we did, accept responsibility and then change ourselves. You accepted what you did now change it. Do better, give yourself better.

She nods her head sadly.

Saelee: Choi San, would we ever try again? Like a real relationship?

I loved her, she loved me so it should be an automatic yes right?

Wrong.

I have the upmost love for her but I want her to do better than me, she deserves better than me. I'm working on building myself to be the man Raven deserves because right now I'm not good for anyone.

Me: You're my precious friend Saelee, and that's all we can be. I'll be your friend that helps you through this.
Saelee: Okay.

She smiles and so do I.

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Raven's point of view

I open the door and San stands there with a velvet box in his hand.

San: This is a small token of my appreciation for you.

I eye him weirdly before opening the box, holy shit Santana was right. He really did buy me a necklace but this is actually cute.

There's three gold mountains outlined by diamonds. Simple but so adorable.

San: Whenever you wear this, I want you to think of me and feel comfort. Like if you're crying or angry and I'm not able to be there just touch the necklace and know I'm always with you in spirit.

He grins making his eyes turn into little crescent moons and his dimples poke out. My whole body turns warm, I smile.

Me: Thank you.

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