Mr. Used Love

Chapter 10: This Is How a Heart Breaks

Laurens's POV
As I was walking up the stairs I could feel Alex drifting off into a light sleep. He could use the sleep, his poor eyes are a dead give away of how tired he is. I get up to the top of the stairs taking a second to take in the scene, me holding Alex. I also looked around for the open door of a guest room. After finding it, I slowly walked in and gently set Alex down on the small twin bed decorated in blue, no doubt a way to show some old college team spirit. At this moment I couldn't help running my fingers through his soft hair and helping prop up his head on the silk pillowcase. This small few seconds of calm and quiet continued even as he opened his eyes. I thought about stopping, but the genuine smile on his face from his realization from my action lit up my heart. Slowly a smile grew on my face in return. 

"Thank you for taking me to another room and being here..."

"Of course, I figured you wouldn't want many people seeing and some quiet." He then pressed his face into my hand and smiled again. Oh, dear how hard my heart is beating. I'm so glad I could be here for him and help him. 

"I can start whenever you want, just take your time. Even take a nap here, I can go down and tell Laff and Herc to wait for you"

"Thanks, Uhm, I think we should start now and just get it done." He seemingly began to frown. I grabbed his hand to hold carefully and looked at him in his eyes. 

"You tell me when you're ready and I will take this at a pace comfortable for you. Okay, I want to help you and make sure you're doing okay both mentally and physically"  His eyes closed and started to water which made my heart wrench. 

How could I stay away from this adorable face, I hate seeing him hurt and so sad.  I want to figure out how to help him more and make him feel better.  I need to make up all this lost time between us and hopefully fulfill my need to make myself feel better for not being there for Alex emotionally or stop to think how my texts could have affected him. Why did I need to send any of them the way I did? Why did I start so many fights?