digital heart | minsung | ✔

40

Spending the weekend with my friends -old and new- made me realize something. I spent a whole week being heartbroken over a boy that didn't give two shits about me, and those seven days were much more than he deserves.

Enough was enough.

With that in mind, I left the dorm this morning with a smile. Not the bitter, artificial smile that I used to wear, but a real one, caused by the whiny Felix that I dragged along. For some reason, he suddenly wasn't ready to face Changbin, getting all flustered when his name was brought up. The rest of us wasn't planning to miss breakfast so after a noisy debate, I volunteered to take him out of his dorm.

Let's just say the volume went up with approximately 100% since last week.

It's like our high school days again, where the three of us were the loud ones everyone seemed to know. Except for this time, we have an evenly chaotic Eric with us, and Hyunjoon who observes the noise with an amused smile.

Lunch break is pretty much the same as that, we just have Hyunjae and Younghoon who sometimes join the chaos and sometimes don't.

Honestly, I'm glad I can finally enjoy my college life. The first week might have been a waste, but it's over now. I'm not letting Minho ruin anything else. A guy that broke my heart shouldn't have this much power over me, and I have no clue why I let it happen for a whole week.

Lee Minho was just a pretty face, nothing more than that. There's plenty of that here, so what's the point of dwelling over him forever?

"Jisung, were are youuu?" Felix wails loudly, dramatically shaking my shoulders back and forth.

"Woah, calm down, Lix," I playfully scoff, already feeling the many eyes on us as I peel his hands off my shoulders. "I was just thinking, bro."

The downside of being loud in the cafeteria; it only takes the smallest noise to have the attention of everyone inside. And Felix just so happens to be very loud, meaning that we catch quite some attention.

"Don't tell me it was about Minho again," Seungmin dryly questions, giving me a look as if to say, we've been over this, Han Jisung.

"Oh, it was," I shrug, taking a bite of my sandwich. I would be lying if I said that hearing his name didn't hurt a little bit, but that's only natural, right?

"Please don't tell me you were blaming yourself again, Ji," Hyunjoon adds, glancing at me worriedly.

I can't help but chuckle at their reactions, their worried faces, their scowls as soon as I admitted that it was again Minho who occuppied my mind.

"Don't worry," I grin, closing my now empty lunch box and tossing it in my bag. "I was just thinking how he was nothing but a pretty face, and how I have better things to do than crying over him."

"Ayy, that's the spirit!" Hyunjae cheers, reaching over our table for a high-five.

Grinning widely, I hit my hand against his, and suddenly everyone cheers, raising their energy drinks and water bottles with wide smiles.

Everything really got better.

But then I catch a person approaching our table from my peripheral vision, and I soon recognize the guy as Changbin. Instead of feeling bitter, I nudge Felix's side with a smug grin as I lean closer.

"Yongbokkie, your man is approaching," I sing-song quietly, watching how my best instantly turns a bright shade of red.

The closer the older guy gets, the more obvious it is that he's walking to me instead of Felix, which confuses me a bit. Once he comes to a halt next to me, I look up to meet his eyes, but he instantly averts his gaze.

"Jisung, can we talk?" he asks.

Next to me, I hear Felix breathing out in relief, and if I wasn't so confused about Changbin approaching me, I would've laughed at his reaction. It's so obvious that he's completely whipped for the guy, but he has a habit of freaking out pretty often when Changbin is involved.

This morning was a fine example.

"Yeah, sure," I reply, pushing my chair backward before getting up. In a swift movement, I swing my backpack over my shoulder and wait for the older to make a move since I obviously have no idea what he has in mind.

I frown as I follow Changbin on his way out of the cafeteria. I'm not sure what he wants to talk about, but I can only think of two subjects; Minho or Felix. Well, I guess I'm about to find out.

We leave the main building, the warm sunshine greeting us immediately. There are students everywhere, enjoying the nice weather now that they aren't in a dusty and cramped classroom. It makes me wonder why we decided to spend our lunch inside instead. I just followed Hyunjae and Younghoon without questioning anything, and before I knew it we were inside sitting at a table, instead of basking in the sunlight in the soft grass.

"I wanted to say sorry," Changbin suddenly speaks up, abruptly coming to a halt next to a tree. "I know apologizing doesn't change anything, I know I should've acted when I could, but you two looked so happy together and I just-"

"Is this about Minho?" I cut him off, and his eyes widen slightly before he nods.

I heave out a sigh before I give Changbin a small smile. "We're good, no hard feelings. You don't have to apologize."

My words cause Changbin to frown, and I shrug my shoulders. "Look, I'm this close to getting over that guy completely. Holding a grudge towards you and Chan hyung only means holding onto things that have to do with Minho so I let it go."

"Still, I can't help but feel bad," the other mutters, but I can tell that he's relieved. "I feel like Chan hyung and I could've prevented this mess, but we did nothing but watch until it all went wrong. I'm not sure what was wrong with us."

"The thing is, I fell for Minho quite fast, sadly," I chuckle bitterly, the negativity slowly lingering in my mind again. "Probably far before anyone else noticed. Believe me, my heart would've been broken anyway, sooner or later. The question wasn't if, but when. "

"Minho hyung really made the biggest dick move possible. If only I knew-"

"Hyung, stop blaming yourself," I cut him off, trying my best not to sound too harsh. "This is on Minho, not on you."

Minho really made a mess. It started with me blaming myself for everything he did, and now his friends are taking the blame for him as well. I really fell in love with an asshole, didn't I? Unconsciously, I ball my hands into fists. What the hell were you thinking, Minho? Were you even thinking at all, when you started this?

Changbin nods, opening his mouth to say something else. But he quickly stops himself and sighs instead. I look at him curiously, waiting for him to continue, which he doesn't. So we just stand in silence for a while, until he awkwardly speaks up again.

"Uhm, thank you for accepting my apology."

"Anything for my best friend's man," I grin, shaking off the newfound negativity as I lightly pat the older's shoulder. "You know how you can make up for this all? Make Felix happy. A happy Felix is a happy Jisung."

"I'll make him the happiest guy in the world," Changbin replies, a smile crossing his features.

I smile softly at the sudden lovestruck expression on the older's face. Maybe Minho and I were never meant to work out, but I'm glad at least my best friend gets the guy he deserves.