Boys Will Be Bugs ( Tomco )

Part 6

Tom collapsed back onto Marco's bed and slapped his hand over his face. Calling himself an idiot in his head.  He thought it was a good idea. That's all he kept repeating to himself. He thought it was a good idea and then it wasn't but to be fair he really, truly, did think it was a good idea. No amount of good ideas would make up for the fact that it happened, and that it clearly made Marco more uncomfortable than he had intended.

Marco didn't exactly know what to do. Should he burst into Stars room and tell the grieving girl that her ex boyfriend that just broke up with her just kissed him and he honestly didn't know what to do about it because he couldn't even tell how he felt about it. But how could he feel about it, his head was beginning to hurt and his stomach churned as he paced around the hallway outside of Stars room.

"Are you alright? You look like you may puke." It wasn't a guardian angel, or anything even somewhat close, but somehow even Janna seemed helpful in this moment in time.

"I'm so glad you asked, can we um, can we talk somewhere?" Marco stuttered out. Janna looked concerned, for the first time ever Marco began to wonder if she actually had human emotions.

"What about your room? Isn't that the most private place we could get?" She replied. Marco shook his head.

"I think Tom is still in there." Marco could've chosen his words a little better. Janna's eyes widened along with her grin as she dropped the bowl of cereal she had been eating and ran down the hall to Marco's room, throwing open the door excitedly. Janna was so excited to find out what dramatic thing had happened between Marco and Tom, and sincerely hoped that it turned out to be what she was thinking, but she threw open the door and was greeted with a completely empty room.

"Awe you tease. He's not even here." Janna frowned as she skipped over and plopped herself down onto his bed. "Therapy is now in session, talk to me baby." Her face flipped and a large grin spread across her face and she patted the spot next to her on his bed.

Marco walked into the room and shut the door behind him, sitting next to Janna and sighing heavily. "Tom kissed me." Janna didn't react. "And now I don't know how to feel because one second he was my friend and everything was normal and then he kissed me and now my stomach's in a knot and my mind is jumbled and I just, I don't know what to do." Marco pushed his hands into his face.

"Well, did you like the kiss?" Janna asked. She could tell this was a serious situation for Marco, and though she never really handled good situations well she wanted to try her best for her friend. When Marco didn't say anything for a while she decided to do what she thought would be best for the situation, no matter how vulnerable it would make her. "Can I tell you something I've never told anyone?" She asked, scooting slightly closer to Marco, he lifted his head from his hands and looked at her, nodding. "Okay, you can't tell anyone. I'm dead serious, not a word or I will kill you. This information does not leave this room or so help me god." Marco nodded again. "I'm gay. Strictly into girls. I mean I had a crush on a guy in first grade I think, but that was my first and last crush on a guy and honestly it didn't go over too well because I think I only really liked him to fit in with all the other girls. Anyway, that definitely doesn't make me an expert in gay things but, I think I know a decent amount." Marco's eyes widened.

"Janna..." His voice trailed off. She shook her head and pushed her hair back.

"Ew, don't give me the soft voice and the 'I accept you's, I really don't need them. I'm getting really close to the point where I'm comfortable with all of the weird sexuality stuff. Seriously I'm like inches away from being out of the closet and I've never really accepted any gushy stuff well so you'll just make it worse if you try to say any of that. Plus I'm friends with Jackie and she's in Paris about to start dating this cute girl named Chloe and I gotta say that really helps with the whole feeling accepted thing. I don't need any kind words." Marco's brain was getting more jumbled with every word Janna said. He didn't even know Jackie was in Paris, or that she was into girls. "So I'm going to ask again, did you like the kiss?" She asked.

"I'm not gay." Marco responded quickly. "Not that being gay's a bad thing, I mean I'm perfectly fine with you and Jackie being gay but I-I'm really not." He assured. Janna shook her head.

"That's not what I asked. I didn't ask if you were gay Marco. I asked if you liked the kiss." Janna frowned. "Here, think of it this way; Don't think of Tom as a guy, or your friend, or even as Tom. Separate the kiss into it's own thing, thinking of it as it's own thing separate from any other factors, did you like the kiss? How did it make you feel?" She asked again.

Marco stayed silent for a while, he didn't know how honest he even wanted to be, but Janna was letting herself pull down her walls he could be at least honest with her. She was being honest with him as well after all. "I don't know, I guess I may have liked it. He kissed me and my stomach filled with butterflies and, and it was so different from any kiss I'd ever had before. My stomach had never felt like that and my heart had never pounded so fast and so hard and my hands got so sweaty and my face got all red and hot and, and I don't even know what any of that even means." He explained.

"Okay, would you kiss him again? Given the chance I mean, and no one would know about it and it would just be between you two and it wouldn't cause anything awkward afterward, would you?" She asked. Marco wanted to stop answering the questions, but he promised himself that he would be honest with her.

"Yes." He mumbled. He collapsed back onto his bed and covered his face with his hands. "I don't understand what's happening. One minute he was just my friend and now I feel like if I saw his face I'd go right back to how I was feeling when he kissed me." He sighed. Janna laid back next to him and turned on her side to look at him.

"You want my honest opinion?" She asked. He nodded hesitantly. "Kiss him again, dude. I think you guys would be cute together and no matter what his reason was to kiss you, I've always thought you guys both had a secret thing for each other." 

"You think he likes me too?" Marco blurted. The moment he heard himself say it his face flushed again and he wished he could disappear. Janna raised an eyebrow.

"Too? Did you just ask if I think he likes you too?" She grinned. Marco shook his head and pushed his hands harder into his face. "Awe Marco, you can tell me that you have a crush on him. I'm not going to judge you." 

"You won't, but everyone else might." He frowned. "And him and Star just broke up. It would be messed up for me to try and... and.... and I don't even know how to finish that sentence, I don't even know what I'm trying to do! I mean do I want to date him? Do I want to kiss him again? Do I want to play with his hair while he lays his head in my lap and makes me laugh again?" Marco rambled. "I don't even know what I want."

"I'm going to ignore the playing with the hair thing, no matter how cute that is, and try and give you the best advice I can right now. Which is, I think you should talk to him. If you want to figure out what you want so bad maybe you should figure out what he wants first." She offered. Marcos hands were placed over his eyes, he groaned loudly.

"I don't want to see him right now! Well, actually all I want right now is to see him but I want to see him in the time before he kissed me. When we were just friends and we were just hanging out." Marco frowned.

"Well it's a little too late to take back his invitation now." Janna replied. Marco pulled his eyes off his hands and sat up to see Janna holding his phone. 

"W-what are you doing?" Marco asked frantically.

"Listen, you knew who I was before you dragged me in here. And I swear on my life I took every word you said seriously and I spoke the honest truth the whole time and I swear I will never tell a soul what has been shared in this room today. But that being said, Tom is going to be in this room in like five minutes and he thinks you just texted him to meet you here because you wanted to talk."