Dirt

38; Epilogue #1

So teehee I abruptly decided to end the book on that chapter despite having more written. In lieu of posting this as official chapters, I have decided to just leave them as Epilogues. They aren't great or very satisfying but life is life and Dirt is over. Enjoy

Princeton

Stan tried to convince me to finish school up there in his town. I know and understand why. I'm fresh back in the world, my family are hours away in all directions, and school isn't as easy as I thought it would be. For a bit I considered it. 

But I couldn't go. I have four months of school left, two jobs I have to figure out, and a group of boys I needed to rely on. So he let me stay. As long as I called him every other day and come visit him every other week. It's a deal I could take. A deal I had to take. 

That was only after hours of fighting and millions of attempts of compromising. Stan thinks he needs to pick up the helicopter parent role in my life. I understand why, I haven't exactly been the most stable. But nearly eighteen leaves me clinging to the independence I had before Dad and Donna. 

I still work at the cafe and bookstore -when I was forced to give up one of my jobs I couldn't get rid of the environment that supplied calm outlets in pages or coffee. I still try to work as much as possible. Partly because I feel immensely indebted to Ms. Lauren for allowing me to stay at her house. Partly because I feel like I can ever stop. If I stop I don't know what will happen. I'll bow to the urges, I'll break my promise to Stan, to Cedar, to everyone. If I stop I'll think about Dad and how horrible he looked the last time I visited him. If I stop I fear I'll lose the buzz of being...content.

"What if I started saying 'bloody hell'?"

I snort, adjusting my jacket to ward off the cold, scanning to find Stan's car.

"Okay, but, like, think about it. We could all be so much cooler if we just started saying 'bloody hell' at everything? A couple of chaps from across the pond in a wee country town-"

"I don't think you called me to ask to be British with you."

I finally do find Stan's car, him frantically looking out his windshield to see if I'm coming. I weave past passengers to get to the small Honda. Stan perks up when he sees me approaching.

"Oh, no.  I hope we didn't wake up too late. I called to remind you to punch your Mom for me -What in the bloody hell, Roger?" Cedar screams on the other side of the phone, not into it but directed at someone.  I can hear Roger hissing back somewhere in the background.

I freeze momentarily with my free hand resting on the door handle of the passenger side. Stan's got an eyebrow cocked, locking and unlocking the car door. I hadn't forgotten, more like ignored. Ignored who I was coming to see, ignored who I have finally give into.

"Oh," I bite my lip, forcing myself up from the pool drowning me. I open the car door, sliding into the passenger seat. I toss my backpack in the clean backseat, buckling in. Stan narrows his eyes at the phone pressed to my ear but I just shake him off, "I will, yeah. She'll be thrilled."

"That's what I'm saying. One brother from another mother to whore with your DNA-"

I frown, "What? That's not how it works and you shouldn't try to make it work," Once Stan realizes I'm not going to stop talking, he shifts into reverse and pulls out of the bus station.

"Don't be silly, it's fine. I like it -Roger, I'm having a conversation if you could just stop existing for a split second? Okay? Fuck off." Roger screams back 'You're a fucking idiot, my god!'.