Infinite Lists my crush

Days of no filming

I go home. We get to have two- three weeks off. I go visit Tal. I go in. Honey, I'm home. I yell joking. He comes down stairs looking down. He looks up and sees me. He runs and hugs me.

Okalynn. He says happily. He picks me up by the waist and spins me around.

Hey, big bro. What's up. I say

Nothing. Just I was getting my kids ready. Raleigh, Rhea! He yells

Yes, Daddy. They say. They run to me. I pick them up.

When did you guys get so big. I ask. They have a lollypop in their mouths.

Since now. Rhea says.

Wow. You have beautiful hair guys. I say. Turns out Rhett is now Raleigh. He's transgender. She is beautiful. We talked over the phone about it. Hey, Raleigh, do you like being a girl now? I ask

Yes. I love to play dress up and play dolls. She says.

Okay. I say and put them down. I leave to go visit Adi.  His kid Tinley, and Thomas

They're also two years old. Tinley, Thomas. I say as they run to me.

Auntie Okalynn. They say to me and hug me.

What's up? I ask

Nothing. They say and jump off of me, I go home. Me and Caylus start to fight.

Why are you so stupid! He say touchy at me

It was a mistake. I say. Later we go to a therapist to talk about the miscarriage.

So, you lost your kids right? She said

Yes. Caylus said. We start to talk.

Do you have a diary for writing in? She said

Sometimes yes. Caylus said

Okalynn. She says

Ever since I was a little girl. I say sarcastically

Okalynn. Caylus said

This is a safe place right? I ask.

Yes. She said. I sit up in the couch.

He, cant admit we lost the kids, it can't be real, then if its real he has to deal with it, and he can't handle that. I say

Like this is super easy for you? Huh? He said

What! Its not easy. I say

Well at least you had a relationship with them. Who will they always know. Who will they look to for everything, when we get to heaven. You had a relationship that I never had! So, your saying I never will have it. He said angrily tears down his face.

Daddy! The girls say. He gets up with force and leaves the room. I hear the door slam. They lady looks at me in a look I can't explain.

You just upset your husband so much he had to leave the room. And look at Arianna and Brianna, they're scared of you right now. She said

No, We're amigos. I say

Yes. They say

Surprising. She said

Look hear Evelyn. I care about him to much for him to hurt. I want the hurt to fall on me. Not like the dread is big enough. I have depression. I don't want to live, from what I've been through. I was always bullied and the people. No matter how much I try. I let people step over me so they don't get hurt. I say. I get so upset that I get up and run out the room. I hear the girls go. Mommy. But I just leave. I run and run. Rain pouring. I'm soaked but I don't care. Tears are drying on my face from the cold. I run and run. I find this city. I'm in down town Austin. A  Car speeds by. I slip and I scrape my knee. I get up and keep running. I don't stop crying. Not to mention its dark it raining, I'm tired I want to go to sleep. I find this ally way. I walk trough it. I now sit in the alley its dark and cold. I find an old mattress and pillows and blankets. I fall asleep. I wake up and go into the big town. Looking like a mess. I check my phone. Messages fill my screen from Caylus.

Come back

I'm sorry

Okalynn respond

This is my fault

I just want to cuddle you

I just want to take you home

I respond.

I'm in down town Austin pick me up.

Okay

He gets here in a couple minutes. I get looking nice. I go home. I cry for no reason. The dread is hitting. I sit on the couch. The kids at their grandparents house. They don't get it. I take a pregnancy test. I'm shocked by the results. I'm pregnant with triplets. This is amazing. To be exact three girls. Our last children. So we have six girls and one boy.

Day care Aphrodite p.o.v

Okay. The women says. Aphrodite how much siblings do you have? She says

I have six. Well going to be six in five months. I say

How much sisters and brothers do have? She asked

Three sisters.  Going to be six in five months. I say. No brothers