A no-nonsense, fairly silly, guide to cooking during the apocalypse.
This guide will teach you how to cook, how to make your own recipes, basic fundamentals of cuisine, why brown is the tastiest color, how to prevent your pee from attracting maraud...
The survival of the fittest means that only the strong may survive the apocalypse. Sometimes, it literally means the strongest, while sometimes, it means being the smartest.
This means that those who know how to adapt and use their resources to the maximum can live on to repopulate the earth, while the weaklings are subjugated and enslaved to be saucemakers, or something.
You, the apocalyptic chef, are the creme de la creme, the top honcho, the leader of the bunch. You can adapt to any situation, no matter what, using your culinary know-how and quick thinking.
What if you are found unarmed in the middle of the forests, and a Grilled Bear tries to eat you? What if you sustain damage and need to absorb the blood before going back to your bunker? What if you need an antiseptic or a cold pack to last you through some nasty burn?
The answer is, of course, pastries. Those sweet, sweet treats are so much more than a simple snack for a long journey. In the right hands, they are life-saving tools that would make any journey to the wasteland so much better. Never again will you be caught off guard!
POUND CAKE
The most basics of cakes. Named after so because the quantity of each ingredient used is exactly one pound. This cake is perfect in the wild, as it is very dense, perfect to use as a bludgeoning weapon in a pinch.
Like many cakes, this cake gets its volume and fluffiness from whipping eggs, sugar, and butter. Since it is very dense, it can be eaten as if, or with some light whipped cream.
Mise en Place:
- 2 Cups Flour
- 1 Cup Butter, at room temperature
- 1 Cup Sugar
- 4 Eggs
- A Pinch of Salt
- Vanilla to taste.
- Chocolate chips, berries, zests, or whatever extra flavoring you want(optional)
1. Grease and flour your mold. This is an important and crucial step, so don't skip it! Just like with bread, we flour anything in touch with the mix to avoid it sticking to the mold, and therefore helps with even baking and unmolding. To grease a pan, simply grab some butter and coat theinterior of the mold. All of it. Don't dare leave a spot. We are greasing it because it makes it easier for flour to stick to the pan if its greased. Now, put some flour into the pan and move it around for it to stick to the pan. When everything is coated with a thin layer, shake the excess off.
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