Chapter Four: Cracks

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(Lucchii- Chosen Ones.)
(Minor warning here, this will contain a small amount of self-harm with Kuai hurting himself.)
-Hanzo's POV- "Kuai Liang isn't doing well," I say, setting down my cup of tea as Bi-Han sits across from me.
"I definitely know that he isn't doing good." Tundra fills in, looking troubled as he leans against the table Bi-Han and I are sitting at. "Care to fill us in?" Bi-Han asks, sounding like a worried older brother should.

Tundra looks at us, arms crossed. "He...is very depressed. I mean, 'keep-him-within-your-sight-he-might-hurt-himself' type of depression. Heavy stuff." Bi-Han sits up so fast that he knocks his chair over. I jump at the clattering noise.

"You know him better than we do! You technically are him, Tundra. You share his thoughts and feelings. Tell. Us. What's. Wrong."
"Okay," Tundra narrows his purple eyes. "But you won't like the answer." He sits down with us, the icicles on his back pricking up slightly.

"Kuai Liang has always been troubled. It really hit him hard after you died," Tundra motions to Bi-Han. "His mind is similar to an echo chamber. Thoughts like... 'I will never be good enough', 'I don't deserve a lover,' 'Does everyone secretly hate me?' 'I don't deserve the title of Grandmaster'....It's like that on a loop. A broken record. But know this, if you do confront Kuai, he will get aggressive. That is his nature. He has this constant pressure of not being good enough. That pressure has broken him, fractured his heart. Just...." Tundra's purple eyes fill with tears, forcing him to fall silent.

He sighs, exhaling a cloud of icy crystals. "He'll never admit this, but he needs help. I need help as well. He's crying again....Ow!" Tundra jolts, looking down at his arm. Scratch marks form on Tundra's arm, but not deep enough to draw blood.

We all watch the marks suddenly heal. "Why..." I stammer. "Did the scratch heal?"
"We're immortal," Bi-Han answers. "Since we can't die, any wounds we have heal instantly. We need to leave. Now!"
****
-Kuai's POV- I watch the scratches heal almost instantly. With an annoyed sigh, I put my hood up and face the Hourglass again. I bite my lip when I see all three of them in the glass reflection.
"What are you guys doing here?" I demand. "Hanzo, I told you to tell Bi-Han that I'm fine..."

"I know you aren't okay, Kuai," Hanzo states firmly, sounding hurt.
"I felt those scratches, Kuai. Don't hurt yourself," Tundra pleads.
"Just let us help you, little brother. I know you're still grieving! You don't have to suffer in silence!"
"You have no idea what loss is," I say in a low voice, feeling my hands curl into fists, then turn to face them.

"You don't know what I've been through, brother. You know nothing about how I hate myself, how I just want somebody to love me for who I am!" I shout, ice forming on the obsidian floor in my distress.
"We do love you, Kuai." Bi-Han counters back.
"I love you. I always have. Just come with us. We're grieving as well."
"Are you?" I sneer. "You didn't know what it is like to lose a child."
"But I know what it is like to lose a brother. Kana wouldn't want you to feel this way."

"Don't," I tremble. "you dare say his NAME!" Tundra gets in front of Bi-Han and Hanzo. "Kuai, enough!"
I charge at them as Tundra forms a clear shield of ice to block me. They all look at me through the distorted surface in fear and terror.

With an enraged scream, I pound at the ice over and over. "All of that stuff is so easy for you to say! You've all changed and grieve like it's no problem! When I grieve, it's always for the WORSE!" The icy surface begins to crack. "I'm just not good enough for any of you, is that it?! All of this pressure is on me! I'm the punching bag here! But now....? I'm not good AT ALL!" I stop pounding on the ice, simply slumping down as I finally break down. I stare down at my shaking hands.

"You all....actually love me, don't you...?" None of them say a word, but simply stare at me. "What am I doing?! Wh-why do I want to harm all three of you? I just want help....I really need your love and support."
"Put down there shield, Tundra...." Bi-Han commands softly. Tundra reluctantly does so.

I'm on my knees, refusing to look at any of them. I hear my brother slowly walk over. I feel his arms wrap around me gently, my face buried in his chest. I cling to him like a scared child. Hanzo hugs me from behind, all three of us on the ground.
I try to squirm my way out, but their grip only tightens. "No more running," Hanzo murmurs.

"Just let us help you." Bi-Han croons.
"I..." My eyes widen, before closing tightly. I hiccup. "....Thank you...."
****
I wake up in bed at the Lin Kuei temple, wrapped in my familiar polar bear fur blanket. The cracking of the fire puts me at ease. I stare at the ceiling, letting my tears fall. I remember everything that happened.

My anger, my grief. My heartbreak. The door to my room suddenly opens. Bi-Han walks in, setting a bowl of soup down quickly once he sees that I'm awake.
"Kuai..." He sounds relieved, kneeling down to meet me at eye level. "How are you feeling, baby brother?"
"In all honesty? Somewhat hungry," I joke.

He smiles, kissing my cheek quickly. "Well, I can help with that." As I eat, he fills me in on what happened. Apparently, I've been asleep for almost an entire day. I had collapsed after finally accepting help. Tundra had teleported us back here and everyone waited for me to wake up.

Bi-Han said he hasn't slept this entire time. At least I know he really cares. "And the Hourglass? Will we be able to go back?"
"Let's take care of you first, Kuai." He sits next to me once I'm done eating. I close my eyes, leaning against him as he holds me. His heartbeat is soothing to listen to. "Thank you for doing this. How is everyone else?"

"Worried, especially Raiden. He was unnerved when we told him what happened. He plans on talking with you later today, to help you vent out."
"That's good. Can we stay here a bit longer? I like being near you."
"Hm. Of course," he whispers.

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