8th Period

24

I rushed over and seen Carson with tears in his eyes. I grabbed his hand and let him to my bedroom where we sat on the floor. He looked like he had just seen a ghost.
"What's wrong?" I asked impatiently.
"They were- they were- they were."
"Spit it out."
"Fucking, they were fucking." Carson said tears rolling down his cheeks.
"Luna and Taylor?" I asked hugging him tightly.
"Yeah." He managed to choke out.

He was so hurt, Luna and him have been together for almost two years. I know Carson is head over heels for her.

"I'm sorry." Carson said collecting himself. "You and Ryan just broke up or something and I'm crying over something I knew was gonna happen. I'm sorry." He said holding me tighter.
"No don't be sorry, it's okay." I pulled away, still in his arms and brushed his warm tears away and he did the same to mine. I think the molly is starting to kick in because I have the urge to just kiss him.
I looked in his eyes and he leaned in a little bit turning his head to the side waiting on me to do the same, and did some reason; I did. I pressed my lips up against his and we kissed for god knows how long. I pulled away and something just came over me. I stood up and locked my bedroom door then pulled Carson up. I pushed him down onto the bed and took my shirt off. I leaned down and kissed him sloppily while he unhooked my bra. He pushed me and got on top, he took his jeans off and slowly pulled down my shorts. He pulled down my underwear and rubbed me, and eventually he took off his boxers.

"Do you want to?" He asked
"Just fuck me already."

And he did just that. With his every move I let out a quiet moan. What am I doing I though to myself. I couldn't stop myself from it though.

It was awkward after, so I went to the kitchen wearing his shirt and grabbed some weed and two beers. Hazel and Dennis were asleep on the couch and the house was wrecked. I went back in the room and shut the door. I handed a beer to Carson and put the weed in a bowl I had hidden under my bed. I took a few hits and handed it to Carson. I chugged my beer and grabbed my phone off of the table.

Three messages from: Ryan 🖤
Two missed calls from: Ryan 🖤

My heart shattered once again and I opened the messages.

"I'm sorry Jaz, I didn't mean it at all."
"I love you"

I shut my phone off and turned to Carson who was staring at me. He passed me the bowl and spoke up. "Do you wanna talk about it?"
"No." I replied taking a few more hits and setting it aside. "Do you wanna make out for a little bit though?" I asked running my fingers through his hair.
"Duh." He said pressing his lips softly against mine.

We kissed for a few minutes then went to sleep.    

I woke up wrapped in Carson's arms. He was still sound asleep and I slowly grabbed my phone and seen no messages from Ryan. I set my phone down and laid back on Carson's chest and let out a deep sigh. I lost my virginity to him and not Ryan. What the fuck was I thinking. I looked at my hand, the ring he gave me was still on and was on the whole time. A few tears ran down my cheeks and I held Carson close.

I tried to go back to sleep and when I couldn't I got up and took a shower. I guess I woke Carson up because a few minutes into my shower I heard him moving around and come into the bathroom.

"So what happened last night was just between us right?" He asked calmly but had concern in his voice.
"Yes, that was just a one time thing right?" I asked.
"I mean, I think so." He said closing the door and opening the shower curtain. He got in the shower with me and began to wash his body.
"So just a two time thing?" I asked seductively kissing his neck.
"Yeah just a two time thing." He said.

I had sex with him again. Of course I did. Why wouldn't I? But this time all I could think about was Ryan.