8th Period

28

The tears rushed down my cheeks. Numbness filled my body. I somehow got home safely and ran straight to my room still crying. I texted Hazel, Dennis, and Carson to come over. I needed them. Then, I went to Luna's room and broke down in her arms.

"Jaz, what's wrong?" She asked.
"We broke up." I said bawling my eyes out.
She held me close and texted our group chat to hurry.

About thirty minutes later everyone showed up. Hazel brought me break up gifts. I didn't need any of it but I was thankful she was trying to comfort me. Still laying in Luna's bed, Hazel handed me a blunt and chocolate. I took the gifts and I broke down in front of all of them.

"We could beat his ass you know." Dennis said nudging Carson. I managed to laugh.
"No, it was my fault."
"What happened, do you wanna talk about it?" Hazel asked.
"No, no I don't." I wiped my tears away and forced out a smile. I sniffled and said, "let's go smoke."

We piled outside and started a rotation. I got violently high and left everyone outside to be by myself. I scrolled through the pictures of Ryan and I. Tears trickled down my face as I heard my bedroom door open. Carson walked in with a concerned face.

"So, what happened?" He said sitting down on the edge of my bed.
"I told him." I said looking over at him.
"About us?" his voice rose.
"Yes, I fucking told him that I fucked my best friends boyfriend. He kept talking about our future and I couldn't hold it in any longer." I said in a hostile tone.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen. We were both fucked up and and acting immature." he said.
"Yeah right, tell that to the next morning. I fucked up terribly. I really love him."

The rest of the group gathered into the room. Luna must have picked up some bad vibes because she was in a mood for the rest of the night.

Everyone stayed at my house. Dennis drove us to school that morning. At school, everyone tried to distract me as much as they could, but all I was thinking about was Ryan. I also was thinking about going to his classroom, apologizing, making up, and everything would be fine. But, that wouldn't happen. I had anxiety all day about seeing him, I couldn't focus in class, I struggled the entire day. Soon it was time for eighth period.

Hazel, Luna and I met up in the hallway by the stairs before going to his classroom.

"You will be okay. Just pretend like everything is normal, you don't even have to look at him if you don't want to." Hazel said. I nodded and we walked to his classroom.

The door was open and I put my head down while I was walking to my desk. Out of the corner of my eye I seen our principal. I immediately felt concerned.

As everyone came in the room our principle spoke up, "I regret to inform you that Mr. Andrews has decided to quit. He unexpectedly had to move. Your class will have substitutes for the remainder of the school year. Today will be a study hall so keep talking to a minimum."

My heart dropped to the floor, tears rushed down my face. I tried not to make it noticeable. My friends comforted me as my body went numb.

I just lost my soulmate. The man I am in love with has slipped away.

I grabbed my phone and instantly started to spam text his phone. After a while of not delivering I checked Instagram. He had blocked me. I tried to control my breathing and had a panic attack in class. Eventually, I calmed down and signed myself out of school. I immediately drove to Ryan's town. I had to know if what our principle said was true.

Did he actually move after a mere 24 hours?

My heart shattered as I pulled into the driveway, a for sale sign placed at the edge of the lawn, his car was gone, and a brown box sat on the porch. I parked and went up to the box, inside was my belongings. Tears poured down my face as I examined. My clothes, shower stuff, my phone charger, and pictures of us ai printed for him. They laid neatly inside and I sobbed picking it up. I tried to knock on the door because maybe he would answer, maybe he wouldn't leave, maybe he would take me back, maybe.

After knocking for what seemed like hours, I looked in the window and saw nothing but emptiness.

I felt ridiculous. I grabbed my things and went back to my car. I wiped my tears and left.

Maybe we weren't meant to be.

I needed to focus, for so long I was distracted by him. We were about to graduate then I was going to college. I needed to start getting ready to leave and I didn't need Ryan, I'm strong, I'm independent, I was alone for so long before him and I can do it again. I put on a brave face and tried to block out the bad thoughts. I completely cleaned out Ryan's belongings from my house, the joggers he once wore to bed still smelled just like him. I put everything in a box and carried it to the basement.

"Jasmine" Luna called my name from upstairs. I peaked my head around the railing and she made a frown as she walked down the stairs.
"Is this all his stuff?" She asked. I nodded.
"Well I know something that will make you feel better! Well, hopefully."
"What's that?" I asked wondering what the hell she has planned.
"Ethan is having a party tonight, you should come."
"Will there be drugs?" I asked.
"Most definitely."
"Perfect."

We went upstairs and I called my mom. I asked if we could go to Hazel's house tonight and she agreed.

I dressed in a tiny black dress paired with glittery black heels. I applied mascara and sat on my bed waiting for Luna. I refreshed Ryan's instagram repeatedly searching for a change in our friend status.

Luna peered her head in my doorway and said she was ready.

Luna drove to the party. The house was flooded with people. Anxiety started to creep up on me. I pushed it to the side and tried my best to have a good time.

Familiar faces surrounded me. I greeted Ethan.

"Wanna smoke?" He asked
"Of course." I replied following him up the stairs and into his bedroom.

He rolled a blunt as I spun around in his desk chair.

"Do you have Mr. Andrews?" He asked and I froze.
"Yeah, I do why?"
"Like, he just quit. No explanation or anything. Shits crazy." All my fault I thought to myself.
"Yeah it's crazy." I said quietly trying my best to hold everything in.

Ethan motioned for me to come sit on the bed.