Sanders Sides Oneshots

My Teacher, The Vampire- Logicality

I saw a few different Tumblr posts and this idea came into my head. Enjoy some Logicality and some vampire content. I missed y'all and I promise I'm getting back into filling out requests that came in like a year ago. But until then... maybe a short little series? There's not much Logicality in this part, but I'll try to release some more of this in the next few days.
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It was the widely accepted theory of the local high school: Mr. Logan Kroft was the weirdest goddamn teacher anyone had ever seen in their life. And it wasn't an unfounded theory. The AP World History teacher was so eccentric, no one was quite sure how to approach him. There was no way he didn't know how weird he was: it just wasn't possible. But along with that theory came another one: Mr. Kroft was undoubtedly in love with Mr. Morales from down the hall.

Not a far leap to make, in the student's defense (and many teachers). Every class break, the two would wander down the hall to talk and banter until the class bells forced them back to their jobs. Mr. Morales was a very lovable individual, it was nearly impossible to not feel safe. The Home Ec teacher was truly something special. But I stray from the point. Mr. Logan Kroft.

There is no doubt he was an effective teacher. Oddly enough, his students learned in that class and they enjoyed what they learned. But his methods were unusual, to say the least. Not once in his 15 years of teaching had any student seen him crack open a single textbook. But each lesson was filled with astounding detail, some oddly specific. He seemed to be an expert on every era but almost never used the prescribed text.

And no matter what, he was never seen without a bottle of coconut water. Never. Sure, the brands would vary but he undoubtedly would have a bottle with him at any given moment. Constantly sipping throughout lessons, conversations, and meetings. And he was maybe the only person who (most) people encountered that really used their reusable metal straw. "You hadn't seen the earth at its peak. We must preserve what we have left," was the response he always gave. But he wouldn't have been around to see the earth at that time either, right?

And he had been teaching at this school for 15 years. He should have looked aged, correct?

He was odd, there were no two ways about that. But he had somehow snuck his way into the hearts of every student who idealized him. No matter what, he was beloved and though he wouldn't say it to their faces, he loved his students too. They listened, they were attentive, and some were rather funny. So, it shouldn't have been a surprise when some students wanted to get their favorite teachers together.

"Virgil. Virgil. VIRGIL!" Remus screamed into his friend's ear, standing next to his desk with his hands on his hips.

"Roman, would you please get your brother away from me before I really lose my hearing?" Virgil covered his ears and glared at the intruder.

"Remus, go bother literally anyone else." Roman, sitting at a desk next to him, didn't look up for a moment.

"But I have ideas!"

"Ideas or conspiracy theories?" Roman grumbled.

"Both?" Remus leaned back with a tentative smile.

Virgil and Roman exchanged glances. "Did you run them by Janus?"

"Yeah! He's not a fan, but he's just a killjoy." Remus rolled his eyes.

"First of all, that's fair. Second of all, Virgil, don't say what I know you're going to say." Roman gave a charming smile to the boy next to him, who huffed.

"Well, now who's the killjoy?" Virgil crossed his arms. "Remus, are you going to leave without telling us?"

"Nope!"

"Then go get Janus and then say it. If we have to hear it, he does too." Roman snagged an earbud from Virgil as he attempted to plug them into his phone. "Now, don't be greedy, share the music."

"Fine," Virgil barely concealed his smile as he played his Disney playlist. He'd be lying if he said he didn't know it'd turn out like this.

As they talked, Remus returned with Janus in tow. He looked more bored than annoyed. "Are we talking about vampires again?"

"I don't know, are we?" Roman looked to Virgil, who merely shrugged. His answer to life, it seems.

"Okay, hear me out on this one: Mr. Kroft is a vampire and he's trying to turn Mr. Morales! Which I fully support." Remus sat on top of Roman's desk as everyone groaned.

"What's the evidence on this one?" Virgil raised a brow, shifting towards Roman but only because he needed more slack on the earbuds. That was it.

"His teeth are sharp!"

"How much time do you spend staring at Mr. Kroft's teeth?" Roman turned his body slightly to look at the doorway. Surely enough, Logan was leaning against the doorframe with a closed-mouth smile as Patton babbled on.

"Enough!" Remus snapped. "And Mr. Morales made some random comment about how coconut water can sometimes be used in place of emergency blood transfusions! That would explain why he drinks so much all the time."

"Jesus Christ..." Janus shook his head slightly. "Or maybe the guy is dehydrated?"

"He knows so much about history and he never opens a book!"

"'Cause he studied it-"

"No, it's because he actually lived through those time periods! And it would prove that he was around to see 'the earth in its better days'!" Remus put on an exaggerated accent. "But Mr. Morales doesn't know! And he's gonna turn him and make him into his vampire boyfriend!"

"It's official. You're insane." Roman leaned up and flicked Remus's forehead. "How the hell do you come up with these?"

"He doesn't age." Remus said grimly.

"Neither does Paul Rudd, you gonna tell me he's a vampire?" Virgil asked.

"Watch this," Janus spoke over the school bell. Mr. Morales whispered something to Mr. Kroft, then left to his own class. Logan walked past the desks, a soft smile playing across his lips. His grip was tight on his closed bottle of coconut water. "Mr. Kroft, is there any chance you're a vampire?"

And then the unexpected happened. Cool, stoic Mr. Logan Kroft tripped. And tripped hard.

Somehow, his foot caught on a desk and he fell face-forward, letting the bottle of water slip through his fingers and watching as it rolled ahead of him. Everyone gasped and stood up, but there was no laughter. They all respected him too much for that. But still, murmurs flowed through the room.

Virgil was the first to his feet and the first to offer help to his teacher, giving him his hand and offering back his bottle.

"Thank you, Virgil. I'm not quite sure what happened." Mr. Kroft played it off with a laugh, but his eyes showed how shaken he was. He dusted himself off and looked back at Janus. "I'm sorry, what was your question?"

"Oh, nothing. Just something silly." Janus shook his head.

"Well, alright." Logan continued his way to his desk.

Janus and Remus took their seats behind Roman and Virgil. "See?" Remus hissed.

"Maybe... there's something to what he's saying." Janus bit his tongue pensively.
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I might release another part of this after my therapy appointment tomorrow. It's 3am where i am so i'm going to try and sleep now. Take it easy guys gals and non-binary pals. Peace out!