Broken Promises

27 | blake

Having Noah Reed in my room is a thought I have to take a moment to get used to.

The way Noah looks around after he walks through my bedroom door has me wondering if maybe he feels the same way.

Just a few weeks ago, Noah Reed hardly have anyone the time of day. Now here he is, willingly hanging out with me at my house, even though he knows my crazy siblings are part of the equation.

If I didn't know any better, I'd say Noah is warming up to me.

As if sensing that I'm thinking of him, Noah turns to face me. "Well, you managed to get me here," he says in a low tone as he crosses over to me. As he moves in closer, I notice the way my breath hitches and my heart beginning to race. I don't know how to control the feeling. It's more like the feeling controls me.

Noah leans down slightly, making up for the height difference between us. His smile is nothing short of rueful as he eyes me before adding, "Now, the real question is: What are you going to do with me?" He raises his eyebrows suggestively, his words making my cheeks flush.

"Noah Reed!" I gasp, more flustered than I'd like to admit. I shove his shoulder, watching as he falls back on my bed. This only seems to make the situation worse, and Noah raises his eyebrows once again as he smirks up at me.

"So that's how you like it . . ." Noah muses, trailing off as he frowns thoughtfully. In response, I whack him with my pillow.

"Okay, okay!" Noah exclaims, extending an arm to block my next blow. "I was only kidding, Rhodes. No need to get all crazy on my ass. Unless, of course, that's your thing." He winks.

I hit him with the pillow again.

"Seriously, I'm kidding," Noah says in a softer tone. He takes the pillow from me and tosses it to the side of my bed, then wraps a hand around my wrist and pulls me down onto the bed next to him.

For a moment, Noah and I lay together in silence. Then Noah asks, "So, what are we supposed to do now?"

"We're not supposed to do anything," I chide. "You're acting like you've never hung out with anyone before."

"Well . . ." Noah trails off, suddenly interested in looking at anything that isn't me.

"You're joking, right?" I question, sitting up so I can see Noah's face better. "I mean, you've had friends before. Right?"

Noah shoots me a look that seems to say very funny. "Yes, I've had friends before, Blake. It's just . . . been a while since I've had a friend I can . . ." Noah trails off, expression lonesome. More than the sad look, I notice the hollowness gleaming in his dark eyes. It's clear that he's hurting inside, and I can't help wanting to take away some of his pain.

Noah Reed needs a friend more than anything. I make a promise to myself that I will be the friend he needs; that I will help him, whether he wants my help or not.

And maybe Noah will be able to take away some of my pain, too . . .

"Well, when I hang out with Jess—the girl you met at lunch?—we just talk. So, what's on your mind, Reed?"

Noah looks dumbfounded. "It's that easy?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like, to talk about your . . . feelings. Is this what it's like to be a girl?"

I roll my eyes. "Anyone can talk about their feelings, regardless of their gender."

"I don't do that," Noah tells me, wrinkling his nose.

"It doesn't make you weak to be able to express what's going on inside of your heart and your mind, Noah," I tell him softly. "It takes a certain kind of strength to allow yourself to be vulnerable. Your feelings aren't something to be ashamed of. Your emotions are what make you human."

"That's why it sucks to be human," Noah counters. "We feel things. And, a lot of the time, those feelings aren't good."

I risk glancing at him, finding his eyes are already on me. His irises don't look so much like a galaxy full of silver stars at the moment. They look more like stormy oceans filled with dark undercurrents, pulling you in to drown in his misery.

"You're right," I agree. I've experienced more than my fair share of pain and sadness in my lifetime, especially these past few weeks with Mason and the circumstances that led to our breakup. "Just because we sometimes find ourselves feeling pain doesn't mean there aren't any good feelings left. Just because you're hurting now doesn't mean you'll never be happy again. It just means you have to try a little harder to find that happiness. Wanna know a secret, Noah?"

Noah studies me for a moment. The mood around us feels serious. Dark, yet hopeful.

"What?" he whispers hoarsely, eyes shifting between the both of mine.

"It's worth it," I say simply. "Even when you feel like you're surrounded in nothing but darkness, there will always be a light at the end of the tunnel. You just have to find it. Some people give up before they can, and that's why they believe the world has nothing good left to offer them. But for everything that is bad in this world, there is twice as much good. So find your light, Noah Reed. I promise you it will be worth it."

Noah's expression softens as he gazes at me, some of the darkness disappearing from his stormy eyes.

Then, barely audibly, he whispers, "I think I already have."

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a/n: someone tell me why i'm listening to music from victorious. kinda slaps tho ngl.