HOUSE OF CARDS | VMINKOOK

12

{Fear}

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When Jeongguk finally wakes up, he turns off his alarm clock with resistance. He barely got any sleep.

You could say he was up all night, thinking about what could have possibly been happening on Jimin and Taehyung's date.

But that just sounds pathetic in his mind.

He texted Jimin, hoping to hear from him about the night, but just got a reply saying he'll tell him in the morning.

And now it's morning, but Jeongguk finds himself not mentally prepared. He grabs his phone, thumb hovering over the call button on Jimin's contact. He really shouldn't annoy him.

After all, Jimin might get suspicious that the whole date thing made Jeongguk uncomfortable. He really shouldn't give Jimin that idea.

His finger slips.

Jeongguk curses, listening to the ringing, still holding the phone away from his ear. When the ringing pauses, he holds his breath, hoping the voicemail was coming next.

"Hello?" Jimin's voice says, instead. It was raspy from sleep and slightly distorted through the phone, but Jeongguk recognizes it every time.

He puts the phone to his ear, trying to sound confident. "Hey, Chim!"

"Gukkie, why are you calling so early?" the elder asks, obviously just woken up. Jeongguk nibbles on his bottom lip.

"J-Just checking up."

"At nine in the morning?"

"Well umm..." Jeongguk frowns, scouring to come up with an excuse. "I-I was just wondering if you're coming to church today."

There's a small silence on the other end, until Jeongguk hears a sigh. "Of course I am. I go every Sunday."

"Oh. Okay," Jeongguk nods, more to himself for being so dumb. He hates how lovesick he's acting. And he's scared that Jimin can sense it, too.

"I'll see ya then Guk," is all Jimin says, and Jeongguk utters out a small goodbye before waiting for Jimin to be the one to hang up.

He falls back onto his bed with a flop, letting out a loud sigh. In all honesty, he wants to go back to sleep like he didn't just embarrass himself.

Scratch that.

Jeongguk wants to go back in time, like he doesn't have feelings for his best friend. Not to mention the odd feelings he has for Taehyung.

When he arrives at the church with his parents two hours later, he gulps before entering the building, a strange wave passing over him whenever he steps over the threshold lately.

It's guilt, he supposes. Guilt for being attracted to men, when the Bible clearly says it is unnatural.

The church used to be a safe place for him— comforting, and he felt loved. Now, he just feels dirty, like he's an outsider that doesn't belong. He feels like eyes are judging him for his sins, and it makes an anxious feeling bubble in his gut.

But that feeling is gone when he sees Jimin walk through the door, blonde hair brushed back, exposing his forehead. And Jeongguk would have never thought a forehead could be so damn attractive.

Jimin has on a white button up, tucked into fitted dress pants, and topped with a royal blue trench coat. He's beyond the construct of beauty.

He smiles gently at Jeongguk's dad, who always stands at the door to greet those walking in. The second they're done shaking hands, Jimin turns and his eyes immediately fall on Jeongguk, as if he knew exactly where he was. He wasn't surprised that the younger was already watching him.