Rise Till' We Fall [TAEGYU]

#3: please listen to me

(Taehyun's POV)

How in the world did Beomgyu get that picture? It was years ago and I thought no one remembered that night, it was a mistake, and the look on his face is really killing me. I grabbed his phone under the table and he grabbed my arm to get his phone back. The teacher glared at us and I whispered to Gyu, " Let me explain, it isn't what you think it is, please listen to me" Hell, I sound like someone who cheated. " Gyu...it's really not what you think it is."

" Tae, it's fine if you have a girlfriend. Why didn't you tell me? It's totally fine," Gyu whispered back, smiling. He's terrible at controlling his facial expressions, I remind myself. "He's not my boyfriend, can you please listen to me? After class? Please?" He just nodded sadly with a painful smile and suddenly his eyes widened. 

" Wait Tae--boyfriend? It's a he? You're gay? " He said the last part a little too loud and the teacher flashed another death glare again. " I'll explain later," I said, pretending to write the assignment. 

When I heard the bell ring I quickly gathered my things and grabbed Gyu's hand, tugging him into the janitor's closet. " That was back in 2017, it was an experiment only, I don't even know who he is, I'm still single as fuck and I'm gay, yes, I was going to tell you but I was scared you would give me the cold shoulder, I was so scared, and I promise I'll tell you everything after this, so don't be mad at me okay? Promise not to be mad?" 

Then I noticed what position we were in. I'm a little shorter than Gyu, but now I'm pinning him to the door of the cramped janitor closet and our faces are so close, our noses nearly touching, and I quickly leaned backward and into a comfier position. 

" I don't understand. The hat--you bought it last month with us when we went to the movies, and why would you think I have a problem with you being gay? I thought we told each other everything." He said, slightly blushing, perhaps from the heat inside the closet. " I lost the hat that day, at the party, I found out my sexuality that day. Then the day when we went to the movies, I saw that hat still selling, so I bought one." I explained.  

Then I noticed that there was some moisture at the corner of his eyes, and he quickly rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand. " Oh Gyu--why are you crying? Don't cry, " I said, wanting to cry just seeing his tears, but he smiled. " I don't know either," he said, then he laughed, and I just had to laugh too. 

Back in our dorm, Beomgyu went in the shower and gave me some space to think. Why was he crying? It isn't really important but the psychologist in me had to know, it's fairly irregular if you think about it. Is he scared that I'll spend less time with him if I have a lover? But why? I'm not going to let myself overthink. 

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Okay I updated this a little later than I had expected since I don't think my original version of this chapter is good enough, also school started yesterday and it's a flurry of events, so I'll try to update on Saturday. 

And I just had to put that adorable pic of Soobin up there, look at his smile! <3<3<3