Of Stars in Cities

Dylann

I turned around embarrassed of how stupid I seemed, I can never understand what they mumble behind that glass window and why they always seemed like they're having the time of their lives, I'm being sarcastic.

I think I always get lost focussing on all the details around us and go off track once they start talking.
I shrugged.

I walked towards the escalator staring down at the tiled floor watching my feet in every step so I wouldnt embarrass myself agai-
-" I'm sooooo sorry"
I squealed to the man I almost pushed over with my hands out as if I would be able to catch him incase he fell.
He shook his head and smiled
-"no worries"

I sighed as I pulled the sleeve of my over sized cardigan back up, I regretted wearing it since I had to push it back up every few seconds and roll my eyes.

I waited impatiently for the next train to get there as I wobbled from my toes to my heels and back. I couldnt help but think if someone pushed me on to the rails.
I stepped back just in case and would glance behind my shoulder every other minute.

Finally, a strong wind came rushing as is pushed my hair back into a gigantic mess, which was now part of my daily routine, as the train came rushing with a great sound of metal bars being rubbed against eachother making me cringe.

I could see my reflection on the glass windows staring straight ahead along with other human beings. Everything felt slower losing focus and consciousness of my surroundings.
I looked myself into he eyes I could almost feel myself-
I was shoved into the train by the mad crowd forcing themselves into the subway wagon.

I somehow managed to find a seat pretty quickly if I'd say, I sat down crossing my arms with goosebumps, I should have brought a jacket with me as I rubbed my arms over the almost see-through cardigan I had bought a few weeks back and stared into the dark tunnel we were passing through.
Once again looking myself into the eyes occasionally.
I never reminded myself to bring a jacket with me even after getting cold everytime I step into the freezing air conditioning used to ventilate the crowded space.

I looked at my phone and the bright screen showned
1:43
I was only an hour and a half late, and I would be there in 20 minutes.
I texted my friend another sorry messege and closed my phone throwing it into my lap as I lowered myself into the seat I proudly managed to find.
I soon closed my eyes, pulling my sleeve up my shoulder once again and I felt safe for once in here.

All of a sudden a man in some hippie style clothing started speaking in Spanish as his hips swayed as he walked through the metro. He would maneuverhimself delightfully through the crowed .
He was holding an old styled guitar that had some stickers stuck on it written in spanish, the strap was clearly torn into many pieces before, but was sewed together overtime with colorful stings.

He had really long dreads of golden hair, that reached his lower back, he was among two other men around the same age who were dressed in a similar style, each held a different instrument between both their hands.
They then started to sing some Latin song as half smiled to them gracefully while others stayed on the phones not glancing at them once. I laid my head on the shaking window questioning life itself as my eyes got heavier and my thoughts got deeper and then calmer. I rested in the big train filled with too many people.

****

I woke up around 20 minutes later in despare soon realizing I was almost at the station that my friends were waiting for me in. I jumped out of my seat as some random eyes stared at me and back at the things each person was caught up with.

I stood there for a second.

I turned around to the door that was almost closing and I impulsively jumped through it as it crashed into my shoulders squeezing me as I shrieked, forcing me to do a 180° spin as I was pushed by the doors.
I stopped to stare back at the metro over my right shoulder while everyone looked at me worried and concerned.
The doors closed, and those faces were never seen afterwards.

I sighed it was almost 2 o'clock and I knew my friends would be mad at this point. I walked towards them when their faces brightened soon after they saw me.

It was the last time we would hang out together for a while now, we never really knew what the future had for us, we were all as hopeless but we all hid it under out smiles.

I hadn't missed out on much except for the delicious steak and burger meal they had at a fancy restaurant. I couldnt do much afterwards, we spent several hours together until sunset.
It was pretty late according to my mother, I stood there and stared into the sky, a big full moon was starting to appear and they skys tones changed from it warm bright yellows into its descrete blue shades.

I headed back home to the same station, the woman was gone and another woman took her place, seeming even less enthusiastic about being there.

Maybe I am lucky?

I unlocked the front door as i heard my brother screaming
-" momaaa, Dylanns hooommeeee"

She came out rushing from the kitchen and asked me how it went.
Her face didnt feel convincing and I felt there was something off.

Before I could answer her, many new boxes caught my eye.
-" what are these?"
I felt blood gushing through my veins feeling worried.
-" well honey, were moving out tomorrow, your father called and told us that the movers wont be able to come next week, get your last stuff ready okay?"

My eyes filled with tears holding them back forcefully and my lips trembled.
My brother just stared at me waiting for me to cry.
I ran up stairs into my room, which most of it had been already packed in my absence.

I didn't want to leave so soon, we already had planned so much stuff to do that week.
I pulled out my phone
7:56
I quickly texted my friends about the terrible news and vigorously slammed my back onto my bed.

I could feel cold tears running down the sides of my face onto the empty mattress.
Moving on wasn't something I was particularly good at, unlike my brother.

I stayed there and felt my body getting calmer and my breath slower as I entered deep sleep.
I dreamt, alot that night, which was not unusual for me, but this time, it was.

Hey guys. Just checking in, pls comment ur thoughts so far and any new ideas!