Far From My Home [COMPLETE]

Chapter 3: Say Something

Peter's POV

"I have something to tell you."

They saw me with her. The media.
They think Spider-Man has a girlfriend. If any of that continues, they could figure out my identity. They could hurt her…

I have to protect her. Because I love her.

Y/N's POV

Hershey's, what a way to start a conversation. Totally not worried AT all.

"Okay, shoot," I step away from him to look at his face; it doesn't even look like his face. It's hard and cold and the only signs of emotion are his clenched jaw and salty cheeks. Not even his eyes.

The beautiful brown eyes that always give him away.
But I see nothing. They look so empty.

Peter's POV

No, don't do it.
Don't go through with it.
You can figure this out!

I have to.

Y/N's POV

He fixates on a point somewhere in the distance, and I have a horrible feeling that it's because he doesn't want to look at me. My heart falls just at the thought, but I do my best to keep an open mind. After all, I really can't predict what he's about to say. Surely whatever my mind covers up with will be a thousand times worse.

It wasn't.

Peter's POV

I can see her mind working already. How she's hurting herself.
Just do it; the quicker you do, the less you have to see her hurt.

But I caused this! I'm causing her so much pain…

That's why you need to do it.

I gulp down all my emotions and pushed the disgusting words out of my mouth.

"Please leave."

Y/N's POV

That's it, that's all he said. I don't even know what to make of it; it's so not like him.

"What?" I ask in disbelief. Maybe I misheard him, or there's something I'm missing. He couldn't've meant it.

He couldn't've…

Peter's POV

Don't make me say it again! Your pain is my pain, but a thousand times worse.

I'd rather bleed out from being stabbed to death than be putting my Sunshine through any of this.

Y/N's POV

"I want you to leave," he repeats, slower for me. Each word has a bite that stings me and, I think, him. But not in the same way. He actually seemed eager for me to go. To get the words out as fast as possible and move on.

"Very funny," I'm in shock; I really didn't know what to say. Maybe this is all a prank.

It can't be real.
It's not real.
It's just some cruel illusion.

"I'm serious, Y/N," his gaze dips to finally meet my eyes. "I don't want you here."

"Okay," he's just dealing with a lot right now, this will all be over soon. "I'll come by your apartment later?"

Peter's POV

Why does this hurt do bad! Please, just stop…

I have to do this. It's the only way to keep her safe. From them. From me.

Y/N's POV

"No, Y/N," his eyes finally tell me something- he's dead serious. He looks away again, as if the sight of me is physically causing him pain. "I don't want you."

I feel the tears cover down my cheeks and the whole world starts to spin.

Peter's POV

Each tear that falls down her face is another knife twisting in my stomach. But, still I have to continue. I force my eyes to be cold and dry. I clench my jaw so tight, my teeth might break. But I have to convince her that I mean every single stupid, painful word.

It's the only way.

Y/N's POV

"You don't mean that," I shake my head, this can't be true.

"But I do."

"But you said-"

"I lied," he looks me dead in the eyes. "I don't want you, Y/N. You're not good enough for me. You never will be."

Peter's POV

She's too good for me. I will never be enough for her, but she'd never accept that. Never.

This was the frosting on her arsenic cupcake. She choked it down, believing every word.

Every painful lie that came out of my mouth.

I can't watch this.

I turn around, my mask closing over by face, shooting a web off at another building. Then I hear a small, broken voice from behind me say:

"But I love you."

And I knew the only way I could leave was to blow up whatever I'd left of her heart (and mine) by saying:

"But I don't."

And with that, I swung away before I could hear her break down. Because if I did, I knew I wouldn't be strong enough to do what was necessary to keep her safe.

I swung away, hating myself.

And I published this chapter, hating myself.

Totally not crying at my own writing.
I hated writing this part so much, I just want y'all to know that. You probably think that I enjoy making my characters suffer (like pretty much every author) but these kinds of chapters always KILL me.

Vote and comment, please! I love reading comments :)

Stay tuned for the next installment of making myself cry during quarantine!

Love you guys 3000 <3