Losing Control

Chapter 9: Space

Previously....

This was certainly different but she was happy and liked the name. Perfect. Just like that the two formed an unbreakable bond.

With his new friend Felix had an amazing day at school. Him and Eb got on like two peas in a pod. It was almost magic. Just the magic he needed actually.

The entire day Felix was successful in avoiding Jason and Jason seemed to have gotten the point and left him. During, biology, the class they had together, tension filled the entire room and memories of what went down the day before flooded into both of the boys heads.

What happened that day was a turning point for the two.

Who knew what there relationship would come to from then on?

The entire day however, Felix would feel Jason watching him. While walking to his lessons, to the cafeteria, everywhere. At first he thought he was just imagining it but during the biology class it amplified and he knew for sure that Jason was staring him down.

He didn't want to see the expression he had on his face so he never looked back at him.

After the school day was done, Felix eventually separated ways with Rebecca on the way home.

They waved each other good bye and once again felix was all alone. He walked slowly to his home, basking in the sunlight. Until a car pulled up next to him.

At one look Felix could clearly tell that it belonged to Jason. He kept on walking not taking any mind to it. But the car then kept on following him at his slow pace and eventually Jason rolled his windows down. He stared at felix who payed him no mind

"Felix." He started.

He didn't really think about what he was going to say he just knew that they've been separated for too long and he couldn't take it.

"Please. Let me just talk to you." Jason said his voice cracking.

It sounded like he's been screaming at a wall for hours, for his throat to be that croaky and Felix noticed.

His mind filled with worry but he couldn't just let Jason saunter back into his life.

he just couldn't.

Felix didn't notice it but the car stopped following. Jason jumped out of the car and ran up towards the unsuspecting boy before wrapping his arms around him and embracing the smaller boy into his chest.

There was something about his warmth that comforted Felix.

He didn't budge.

They stayed in that psoition for a while and the once-risen sun began to slowly cascade into the horizon painting the street in an orangey purple landscape.

It was beautiful.

Felix couldn't leave his arms and tears slowly began falling down his cheek. He instantly wiped them off. He didn't want to seem weak in front of jason. Not right now.

Jason had already let down his defenses down.  Teardrops littered his cheeks. Felix felt them on top of his head as they rolled of off Jason's chin.

"Please." Jason pleaded. "Please. Talk to me."

For the hours they'd been apart Jason felt like he was loosing himself. He already completely recked his room.

When his dad noticed he had a certain look on his face. Like one of recognition but clearly Jason had not the slightest idea why. After a few more seconds of silence felix replied.

"Ok."

Felix followed Jason into the car as it drove to somewhere nice and public.

Somewhere felix would feel safe.

It hurt Jason thinking that felix couldn't feel safe around him anymore but it made sense. What he did was unforgivable but leave it to him to attempt the impossible.

They sat at a Cafe. Jason has insisted he buy Felix some chocolate tea so he did with a muffin.

Felix sat silently while sipping the tea.

That day he decided to wear a huge turtle neck oversized sweater with sweatpants. He was almost certain he looked like a hobo but didn't care.

He needed to hide the scars on his neck, wrist and heart.

He slowly sipped on the tea waiting for Jason say what he came here to.

"Im sorry." Jason said.

At that moment,that was all he could think of. After what went down, he had the chance to calm himself and now he needed to undo the damage. Somehow.

"I don't know what came over me. And i..i just coul-"

"He asked me out on a date. Max." Felix said. "I didnt tell you cause I didn't want you to know that I'm gay." Felix stood up ready to leave but Jason stood up as well ready to followed.

Wasn't that the truth he wanted so bad. Felix thought

Upon noticing this Felix stopped. "I accept your apology but I'm going to need some time to think about it." His voice waivered at the end making it evident he was on the verge of tears.

Jason could hear this and wanted to keep following him.

"Please, Jason." The sound of Felix's breaking voice pierced through jasons heart.

And just like that he was left motionless.

Hearing Felix's confession made jason feel very weird. He didn't feel anything negative.

In fact he felt a bit giddy inside. Something about Felix liking guys made his heart jump.

However, hearing that he was going out on a date with Max made his body roar with anger. He didn't want Felix to date anyone.

He doesn't need any other man other than me. The thought was selfish he knew but he couldn't help but feel the need to claw out someone's face when they got near to his only true friend. Claw. Jason suddently realised how violent his thoughts were becoming and decided to calm down before it got out of hand again.

He made it so that Felix wouldn't see him that night and followed him all the way home. He wanted to make sure thet Felix was truly safe and there was no place safer than under his supervision.

He observed Felix while he followed him home and althought Felix confessed to him what went on. Jason knew. That wasn't the real reason why he was being ignored.