The Only Girl In The World

Chapter Thirty

My throat felt closed off, at this point I didn’t even know if I couldn’t breathe or I just didn’t want to. My head ached and my chest burned, I think I ran out of tears a longtime ago because all I could was stare blankly at the wall.  

Sick dying girl, his voice rang in my head.

I definitely felt like one at this moment. Rick was at the door knocking calling out my name clearly worried, I could barely move to even attempt to open the door. I couldn’t even find the strength to answer him.

Breathe in, breathe out!

Doing my best to follow those simple yet difficult instructions, it felt like I was suffocating slowly. After a few minutes of trying to even my breaths, I eventually got myself together.

I tried, I really tried my best to ignore what he said and get over it. A day had passed but the echoes of his word seemed to be stuck in my head, his words cut something inside me so deep.

I couldn’t help but wonder, if maybe I hadn’t hidden it from him, would he still have wanted to be with me? After everything, did he really regret it so much that I wasn’t worth his time?

I hated this. I hated this so much. I hated how his words had so much effect on me.

I was so much happier yesterday, I was finally coming to terms with everything. So why did he have to go and ruin it? Why did he have to go and break my heart again? 

“Kaylee, please open the door.” Rick pleaded from behind the door.

“I’m coming.” I mumbled, my voice hoarse from all the crying.

Forcing myself up, I wobbled to the bathroom feeling a bit dizzy. Washing my face in the sink, I stared at my reflection in the mirror. The once happy girl was now the sad girl with red eyes and swollen puffy cheeks.

Smile.

And I tried to, but I couldn’t. I’ve faked a smile countless of times so what was different now? I felt so drained and empty.

Sighing, I went back into my room and opened the door.

“Hey.” I mumbled.

“I’ve been so worried about you.” Rick said pulling me into a hug immediately.

I was stiff and cold at first but I slowly felt myself melt into the warmth of the hug. When did I start liking hugs so much?

“I’m fine.” I lied., once more.

“You ran out of their house crying, locked yourself up in your room all night and all day and now I’m seeing you for the first time since and you looked like you haven’t slept at all.” He pulled out placing his hands on my shoulder as he looked at me, a concerned look in his eyes. “Don’t lie to me. Please Kaylee, we’ve gone past this.”

“I’m…not ok.” I said feeling new tears well up in my eyes, I thought they I had run out already.

“What did he do?” he asked.

“Broke my heart again.”  I laughed dryly. “It’s just…he said something that really hurt me.”

“What did he say?” he asked leading me inside the room to my bed.

“He found out I had cancer.” I took a seat on my bed and he followed suit. “And well… He told me he wasted his time on a….sick dying girl like me.”

“Oh Kaylee.” Rick said pulling me for another hug as the waterworks began again. “You know that’s not true.”

“But it is.” I choked out.