it's always you

Chapter 2

"Carmela Isabelle Montenegro! Baka may balak kang bumangon at may seminar tayo ngayon sa freedom hall!" sigaw ko kay carm na mahimbing padin ang tulog may hang-over ata si gaga

"shet ghourl sobrang sakit ng ulo ko, is that even required?"

"lagi namang required gaga bumangon ka na diyan bilisan mo!" sagot ni milan sa kanya.

The seminar was so boring as always naman, it's a seminar for the students under CITHM that's why we need to attend even we don't have class today.

"san tayo ngayon?" tanong ko sa kanila

"sunod tayo kina ice nasa carb sila" yaya ni milan samin, then narealize ko na wala na nga ang boys dito.

"tara na carmela isabelle! Wag ka na maarte diyan pangpawala ng hang-over to, iinom mo lang ulit yan HAHAHA!" pangdedemonyo ni milan kay carmela

-POKNATS-

milangaw(milan): hoy mga kupal nasan kayo?

Yelong malambot(ice): carb

Domingongo(dom): punta kayo?

Bungang araw(me): can we?

Kalvovo(kalvin): dala kayo chix!

Kyleyeah(kyle): bawal uminom yung mahihina ha!

Caramelangot(carmela): kunyare wala ako dito -_-

HAHAHA! Natawa nalang kami ni milan sa itsura ni carm ngayon dahil napikon nanaman sya sa sinabi ni kyle sa gc, sumakay na kami papuntang kumintang dahil susunod kami sa carb. Naglakad kami papasok at malayo palang napako na ang tingin ko kay klaire, she's here.

"kaya pala tinanong ng gagong dom kung pupunta tayo nandito pala ang ginataang hipon!" napaismid ako sa sinabi ni milan, nakikipagplastikan nalang din sila kay klaire dahil naiinis sila at napaka selosa pati kaming mga kaibigan ni dom pinagseselosan lalo na ako. I can't get the point of the girlfriends who's always mad at us! First of all we're already here before them right? Second if we want to fling with our boys we already did it from the first place right? And lastly they are the girlfriends and we can't replace them, oo siguro may ibang lalaki na makakagawa at makakagawa ng kasalanan at hindi namin masisisi yung mga girlfriends na gustong paiwasin yung mga boyfriends nila saming mga bestfriends but come on girls wag nyo lahatin yes I'll admit naman na I have feelings for dom and this bitches knows that pero never sumagi sa isip ko na agawin siya I just want my best friend to be happy and if klaire wants me to distant myself from dom? I will for the sake of their relationship.

"humiwalay nalang tayo ng table girls" sabi ko sa kanilang dalawa at sinundan naman nila ako, napansin din namin ang tingin mula sa table ng mga kaibigan namin na kasama si klaire. My phone beep and when I open it...

"I'am sorry sol, hindi ko alam na pupunta si klaire don't show that ugly face to everyone can you atleast smile? You're making me uncomfy." It was a text from dom but I didn't reply, we just order food 'cause we're really hungry.

"what do you want to drink later? Botts or tower?" excited na tanong samin ni milan

"can I have light drink nalang? I'm not yet ready to drink hard again eh." Matamlay na sagot ni carm

"eh gaga ka alam mo bang mas nakakatulong ang pag-inom ulit kapag may hang-over? Kaya go na wag ka na mag-inarte diyan hindi ka maganda no!" milan said.

Unti- unti ng dumidilim ang paligid, gano'n na din ang langit at mukhang nagbabadyang umulan.

It's already 10pm and we're drinking for almost 4hrs and yet we're still up, I glance at the table of my friends but I saw dom and klaire kissing. I can't even stare at them and watch them, I don't know what to feel! What to act! What the f*ck! Why am I being like this? Akala ko ok na ako? Akala ko move on na ako? Akala ko kaya ko ng magparaya nanaman, akala ko kaya ko ng balewalain na lamang yung nararamdaman ko? Pero bakit ganito? Bakit ang sakit parin?

Pinigilan kong pumatak ang traydor kong luha I pour my glass and I drink it straight, hindi ako nagdalawang isip na tumayo at makihalubilo sa mga nagsasayawan sa dance floor. Act normal sol, the bitch was staring at you. Nakita ko na din si carm at milan na nagsasayaw na at napansin kami ng mga kaibigan namin kaya binabantayan nalang nila ang bawat kilos namin.

"Hey! What's your name?" a man approached me

"yow I'm sol, you are?" sagot ko ng medyo pasigaw dahil hindi kami magkarinigan dahil sa lakas ng music.

"I'm lance." He said.

Nagsayaw lang kami ng nagsayaw ni lance at nakaramdam nalang ako bigla ng pagkahilo, I doesn't even know already what am I doing, but my eyes are still locked on dom who's watching me darkly. When I'm going to look at lance I felt his lips to mine, after that I already saw him cursing while laying on the floor. Then I realized that dom was already holding my hands and grabbing me outside, wala ako sa wisyo kaya hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko ni hindi ako makapagsalita ang tanging naririnig ko na lamang ay ang malulutong na mura ni dom.

I'm already inside the car of kyle, but I saw dom beside me he's driving, I want to look at the back because of our other friends but I can't 'cause I feel that everything was rotating. I want to sleep already but my mind doesn't want, my eyes are already close but my I can still hear everyone.

"dom? What about klaire? Where is she?" tanong ni carmela kay dom

"she already left before this shit happen." Halata sa reaksyon ni dom ang pagkairita

"pahulas muna tayo bago pumasok sa loob please?" yaya ni milan

"you guys can go grab a coffee, ipapasok ko na si sol tulog na eh damn this crazy girl." Dom said

"what did you do solis stella? What the hell is that? Why are you doing this to me? why are you confusing me? f*ck! I'm gonna kill him, how dare he to kiss you like that? Do you even know him? damn you! Don't do that again please? Don't kiss other man next time just don't. How I wish that you can hear me right now, me and klaire is not ok right now, she wants me to distant myself from you but I hesitated, I don't want to lose her but I don't want to avoid you either, I don't know what to do and yeah here you are confusing me right now, natututunan ko ng mahalin si klaire, huli na ba talaga ang lahat para sa atin?".

Hindi ko alam kung paano ko imumulat ang mga mata ko, wala na akong lakas para bumangon pa sa kinahihigaan ko. What's that dom? What are you saying? Naririnig ko ang mga salitang nagmumula sa bibig ni dom, hindi ko alam kung ano ang magiging reaksyon ko kaya hinayaan ko na lamang ang sarili ko na ipikit na lamang ang mga mata ko.

Should I tell him what I feel? Selfish ba ako kung sabihin kong gusto ko akin sya at hindi sya para kay klaire? Gusto ko maging masaya pero yung kasiyahan ko hawak na ng iba, dapat ko bang aminin sa kanya yung nararamdaman ko na ilang taon ko din tinago? O dapat panatilihin ko na lamang itong nakatago at ilibing nalang ang lahat sa limot? Lalaban pa ba ako kung alam ko nanamang wala na akong laban? Kung alam ko naman na may nanalo na, mahal na niya si klaire may magagawa pa ba ako don? I'll just pray for your happiness dom but I wish that someday ako naman, sana someday ako naman yung mapili, I'll wait for that time and for me? it's always you.

At bigla na lamang tumulo ang mga luha ko mula sa aking mga mata at tuluyan ng nakatulog dahil sa kakaisip kung hanggang dito nalang ba talaga.