Mixed Messages (A Drarry Fanfic)

Something You Love

(Harry)

Apparently, Ron and Hermione weren't on speaking terms. Harry had sat down at his normal spot in the Great Hall and found both of his companions missing. Ginny had plopped down beside him and explained that Ron trying to cheer Hermione up had backfired-horribly. There was now a smoking, burning, hole in the rug in the Gryffindor common room. Harry felt so alone without Ron's jokes, and Hermione's witty remarks. They still hung out with him, of course, but every time the other would come into view, they'd rush away. It had been a week of this. Harry tried to help them reconcile, but neither them would cooperate.

Harry was at the Astronomy tower, sitting on the ledge of a windowsill, his foot dangling out of the opened window. It felt nice to get away from the hustle and bustle of Hogwarts. No one ever went up to the Astronomy tower unless they were taking a class, or snogging in secret. Harry watched the sun dip below the horizon and sighed as a gust of wind ruffled his hair. The air smelled like a tropical flower, and fireflies flitted about the grounds. Or maybe they were pixies, Harry couldn't tell.

    "Oy! Harry? Are you up here? Been looking everywhere for you!"
Ron clambered up the staircase, looking sweaty and out of breath.
    "Oh, hullo Ron. What are you doing?" Harry asked, jumping away from the window. Ron held out a finger and took a deep breathe. Finally, he looked Harry in the eyes. He looked miserable, his hair was untidy, he had bags around his eyes, and his skin was pale. Harry was instantly concerned.

    "Ron. Are okay?"
Ron shook his head, and before Harry knew what was happening, Ron grabbed his hand and yanked him to the floor, where he was now sitting.
    "Harry...Hermione she...Harry, I don't know what to do. I tried my best to apologize, but she hates me now! I don't even know why...she's acting so childish!" he finished, sullenly.
Harry day back on his haunches, and studied Ron for a moment. He seemed so sad at that moment Harry found himself murmuring "love will do that to you." Ron gave him a scathing look.

    "Hermione? Love me? Doubtful! Even on good days she can't stand me."
Ron suddenly stared at Harry with a suspicious look.
    "What are you doing up here anyways, mate?" Harry shrugged.
    "I dunno. It's weird. Even though I have you, Ginny and Hermione I feel so... alone." Harry admitted, feeling his guts twist.
He'd felt this feeling longer than he wanted to let on. It started when Cedric died. He felt he could talk to no one, and even if they listened, they wouldn't understand. It was like being on a planet where everyone had a different language than you, and you couldn't understand a thing, and no one could understand you.

Ron was staring at him with a worried look on his face. When he spoke, his voice was soft, and laced with concern.
    "Harry...are you okay? I mean, actually okay? I'm no good at this stuff, but I can get Hermione or..." he swallowed and glared at the ground, "my sister..."
Harry gave him a faint smile.
    "No...I'm good, mate. I probably just have lifelong trauma."
Ron swallowed and nodded.
   "Oh yeah. Right."

Harry would never tell anyone, but he was battling depression. He always tried his hardest to be cheerful around his friends, so much so that they didn't have a clue. It was hard being the upbeat and enthusiastic one, when you were actually depressed. Harry blew a dust ball away from him, and snuck a look at Ron. He was staring at the sunset. Harry too, looked over at the sky. It was now the color of blood, streaked with bits of pink and orange. Harry felt sick, but gritted his teeth as memories of Cedric's cold, pale, and slightly bloodied body swam before his eyes.

Ron clearing his throat made Harry jump.  
    "Harry...you don't suppose Hermione actually does like me..."
Harry forced out a chuckle. Ron glowered at the sky, refusing to look at Harry.
    "Oh enough."
They sat in silence until Ron muttered "do you ever wonder what it would be like, being a muggle? No cares...no magic."
Harry frowned.
    "Well, I can assure you muggles aren't carefree. They have their problems too. I never really think about it. I think life you be quite boring, without magic."

Ron nodded slowly, then locked eyes with Harry, breaking into a grin.
    "Bloody boring."
He glanced wistfully at the sky, and stood, brushing off his pants. He held his hand out to Harry's and pulled him up.
  "Let's go back to the common room."
Harry nodded, and the two boys tromped through the castle.

They had almost made it to their common room, when Harry stopped dead in his tracks. Someone he definitely didn't want to deal with was stomping over to them. His face was murderous and when he caught sight of them, he stormed right over.
    "Out of my way, Potter." He snapped, moving closer to shoulder check him out of the way. Harry was knocked off his feet, but not because Draco had pushed him, but because he smelled familiar. Wafting behind Draco was the smell he'd smelled during potions. He was sure of it.

Draco sneered back at him, as he rushed away.  
    "Stupid, clumsy Potter, can't stay on his feet."
Harry pushed himself off the ground and grabbed his glasses. He stood, staring after him, wondering if it was weird to follow him and try to smell him.
    "Harry! Are you okay?" Ron asked, helping to dust him off.
    "Fine." Harry retorted, still in a weird trance. "Why in Merlins beard would the potion smell like Malfoy?!" Harry wondered. "It's supposed to smell like something you love..." bile rose in his throat. Surely he didn't... "No! I just like the way the cologne smells, nothing more." Harry told himself, setting off with Ron once more.

But as he lay down in his four poster, the thought was unavoidable. The cologne reeked. It was spicy and yet somehow sickeningly sweet. It turned Harry's stomach. There was no way he liked how it smelled. That only meant one thing. Harry, burning with humiliation, stuffed his face into his pillow.
He'd deal with Malfoy tomorrow.