The clock reads 7:00 PM and neither of my parents are home. My parents are working late tonight and should be home any minute. I go straight up to my room so they won't know I just got home. I look out the window and watch as she drives away. It aches, seeing her leave. Even though I know I'll see her soon, it still feels like a part of me is breaking just at the thought of parting with her. I go to take a shower and by the time I'm done my parents are home. I try to stay in my room, hoping not to interact with them as we still haven't talked about the other night. As far as they know, I'm not home. I lay down on my bed and start to scroll through the photos of Skye I have collected over the past few days, I'm in a trance-like state of mind. In this moment all that matters to me is her, and I will stop at nothing to keep her in my life. Suddenly a knock on my door sends me jumping into the air and into a sitting position, I stammer to say "come in" because it's almost certainly my mother and she will come in anyways whether I tell her to or not. When she walks in she notices me hyperventilating and asks, "Are you having a panic attack?" and rushes to my side. I try to slow my breathing and answer to the best of my ability "Yeah, I'm fine; you just scared me. What did you need?" my dad comes walking into the room next. "Honey, your father and I wanted to talk to you about the other night." Oh. Shit. I can't run nor can I tell the truth. "What about it?" I respond quietly, playing dumb though it's quite obvious I know what they want to speak about. "It's not like you to act out like that, so what's wrong? Are you stressed about graduating?" I give a light sigh of either relief or fear, and respond with "Yeah, graduating feels surreal, it's almost hard to believe that in 2 months I won't be in high school any longer." and I give a slight nod to reassure them I'm ok. Surprisingly, they nod as well, seemingly satisfied, and as my mom leaves she says "Ok honey. You know you can talk to us if you need anything. Now get some sleep, tomorrow is your last day of camp." I can't believe they gave me such easy leverage to lie. I smile and get ready for bed, setting an alarm this time so Skylar doesn't need to wake me up again.
I'm sitting in my home's doorway staring at her, tears rolling down her face. "How could you do this to me? you lied about everything, how can I stay with someone who isn't even proud to be my girlfriend?" she pauses, leaving nothing but silence to reign in the air. I look into her eyes and see something I had hoped I would never see in her: hurt. After collecting herself she continues "Don't talk to me, I need a break from this. From you. Think before you act next time." She turns and walks away. What. I stand still for a few minutes in complete shock, she left me. Soon I fall to the ground on my knees and begin sobbing, without stopping for hours. Eventually my parents come home and see me still sitting in the doorway, now with my knees to my chest and my head buried between them. "Blake, what happened?" I just answer with more sobbing. I manage to choke out a "She. She left me. I'm such a fucking idiot. I shouldn't have lied. I don't even care what you guys will do to me, I-" I stop to cry some more. "I had a girlfriend and I loved her. I loved her more than anything. I hid her from everyone because I was scared you would kick me out. I don't want to be a fucking doctor with some rich husband, I want to do physics or write. I did what you wanted just to please you" The tears continue. My parents are silent, looking at each other in almost as much shock as I am from what I just did. And what I just said. They head on inside, and I can hear them fighting from behind the door. It begins to rain heavily, and I am left alone, underneath the balcony of our doorway with nothing but the sound of rain and the frogs leaving their homes to enjoy the rain. Leaving their homes... I have lost all concept of time, so by the time my parents come back outside I have no idea what time it is, all I know is that the sun has set. "Blake, you need to leave. You're a disappointment. We had such high hopes for you, and now we find out you're gay and don't want to be a doctor? I have no idea what that girl did to you, but I can't have you living in our house anymore. We'll begin the emancipation process tomorrow, go pack your things and find a place to stay."
I wake up gasping for breath. Yet another nightmare. My cheeks are stained with tears and my sheets are soaked with sweat. I check the time and it's almost 7:00 AM. I cancel my alarm and take a hot shower. My parents are getting ready for work, and I stopped coming to them with my problems when I was 10, so I'm left to carry the burden of the nightmare alone. We rarely talk, especially while we are getting ready to leave the house. We speak only a few times a day and its usually about my grades. After my shower I get ready and text Skylar to make sure she is still picking me up at the same time. 'Yeah, I can pick you up earlier if you want?" her text reads. 'Of course I want you to! I can't wait to see you!' I text back. Today is Friday and the last day of camp, so I'll need to savor it as much as I can.
Suddenly my phone rings I read the caller ID and answer, "Hey fucker, what's up?" I say excitedly, as if our futures aren't on the line. "I told you to stop calling me that. And my car won't start, do you think you and Stella could drive me to the beach? <y house is on the way?" oh hell no. I know his game. He may deny it but I do know him really well, and I know not only does he take perfect care of his car, but he always keeps an eye on threats to his reputation. "Blake?" I shake my head a bit before saying "Sorry I was zoning out. Her name is Skylar, and I'll have to ask her but I don't see why not?" I try to hide the anger laced behind my words. He says "Ok, awesome! I'll text you my address." Fuck. After hanging up I immediately call Skylar and it rings a few times before she answers "Hey Blake, what's up?" I sigh. "I really hate to ask this of you but Tucker's car won't start and he wants to know if we can pick him up on the way to the beach." Without hesitation she says "Yeah, of course! The more the merrier! I have to hang up though, I'm driving. See you in a few minutes!"
And, as expected, 15 minutes later she pulls up and drives us to Tucker's house where he has a smirk on his face as soon as he sees me. Skye, being the kind person she is, says, out the window, "Come on in, the back is unlocked. We better get going though or we'll be late." And we drive off towards the beach for our last day of camp.
YOU ARE READING
Walking on a Tightrope
RomanceWhen Blake Thompson discovers she is a lesbian, she goes to her seventh grade "crush" for help. He is gay, but closeted, so she makes a deal with him; They date so nobody finds out either of them are gay. But what will become of this? Will they keep...
