(Third book) Philip Hamilton X Reader: The almost truth can beguile

-Chapter 36: Solutions-

It was already noon when Arahz decided to open his eyes and near bedtime again when he stepped out of bed. Even so, he still felt like he hadn't slept a wink. Did he really want to be awake for a probable execution? 

"Pssssst," As he was changing, a mysterious sound came from outside. He buttoned up the last button of his shirt and walked toward his window. He looked outside as a breeze flew inside and made his white hair look even messier. He looked left to right but didn't see a thing. "So now I'm going crazy," He sighed and sat down on his bed.

"Yeah, totally, mind looking down, bro? You're pretty good at that from what I can tell," Arahz raced back to the window and looked down to see Y/N and George dangling from the edge. "Family reunion!" Y/N smiled nervously.

"How do you guys get up this high?" Arahz asked, a bit taken aback as he grabbed Y/N's arm. "It wasn't our intention to barge into your room... Not like this anyway," She sighed as she put both feet down on the wooden floor. "Really? You guys seem awfully good at climbing the castle walls," Arahz mocked and pulled George up as well. "But how'd you end up there?" He asked. 

"Okay so, you're never going to believe this," Y/N said with a smile. "We tried to swing into your room like last time but the rope snapped in the middle of the swing," She explained. "You already broke my window once. Is my window the fourth wall or something? Is that why you wanna break it so badly?" 

"So we both fell," Y/N continued, ignoring Arahz's comment. "And here's the funny part-" "Nevermind, I don't want to know," Arahz sighed, dismissing Y/N. "What?" She gasped as Arahz stared her down. "Fine. You'll regret it though," She mumbled and crossed her arms. "Y/N, we don't have enough time anyway," George reminded as he looked at the sun lowering in the distance.

"Right. We need to talk to your mother... My mother? I don't know, dude. This family tree is getting complicated," She sighed. "We need to talk to the queen," She finally stated. "Good luck with that. She's not up for negotiations," Arahz said. "Don't worry about the negotiations. I think getting to her in time is going to be the real challenge," George told him. "And how are you planning to do that?" Arahz asked as Y/N and George looked at each other and started to chuckle.

"We got that one covered," Y/N simply said.

Meanwhile on the other side of the palace

"So what's the plan, how are we gonna distract those guards so Y/N and George can get into her office?" Jones asked as he looked around the corner seeing a plethora of guards, guarding the hall. John took out a piece of paper. "I got a list of distractions, you can choose," He shrugged. "What?! Gimme that," Jones hissed and he snatched the piece of paper.

1. Throw that rock!

Jones steps into the hall, throws a rock at one of their heads, yells "You've just been stoned!" And runs the other way. 

"Absolutely not," Jones sneered. "Oh, come on. Live a little," John huffed, crossing his arms.

2. Hula

"I'm not even going to read this one," Jones mumbled and skipped to the next point. "Really? Did I write those sick lyrics for nothing?!" John groaned.

3. The gay-kiss

John and Jones step in front of the guards and kiss to distract their blood lust with heart-felt wholesomeness.

"Have you lost your mind, Laurens?" Jones asked. "Whaaaaaaat? Noooooo, I ain't gonna do it," John waved off, turning his head away. "Girl, don't do it, it's not worth it," Jones frowned. "I'm not gonna do it, girl, I was just thinking about it. I'm not gonna do it," John reassured. 

4. The flirt

John and Jones flirt with the guards and attempt to seduce them. They can even attempt to show them this new move: The "throw it back".

Jones glared at John, no words were needed to express his thoughts. "You gave me three minutes to prepare for this before we headed towards the castle!" John shouted. "THREE!" He yelled. "Who goes there?!" One of the guards yelled. "Yeah, and you're also going to get us killed in three minutes!" Jones yelled, smacking John across the face. 

"Did you just b*tch slap me, you slut?" John asked as he rubbed his cheek, pointing accusingly at Jones. "Oh, it's on," He hissed before tackling Jones and going off. 

When the guards approached the pair, they had to step away just to avoid being hit in the face by a shoe and/or arm. "Erm... What do we do, general?" One of the guards asked the leader of the bunch. "Pffffffttt... I don't know. They didn't train me for this kind of battle," He shrugged as he looked at John who was stomping on Jones' face. 

"I don't get paid enough," He groaned with a sigh. "Let's get some drinks and then tackle this problem," He suggested. "Agreed," All of them said as they hurried to the kitchen. "TAKE THIS, OXYGEN THIEF!" John screeched as he pummeled Jones, scratching his face like an angry cat. And just like an angry cat, Jones picked John off of him and kicked him away. 

"They're gone, you thot," He groaned, rubbing his head. "You did a good job at being a complete idiot," He moaned as he touched his knee. "I think it's broken," He mumbled. "See, I AM the best," John smiled with a twinkle in his eye. "Sure," Jones groaned and got up. "Now what?" He asked as John chuckled. "Isn't it obvious?" He asked as he headed toward where the guards were headed. 

"We lock them up in the kitchen,"

"... Have you done this before, Laurens?" Jones asked slightly concerned. "Mayhaps," John chuckled as both of them ran after the flock of guards.