Scars | ✔

Chapter 27

Clementine sighed as she picked up the razor sharp blade, glancing to her phone on the nightstand. Her phone illuminated the surrounding area as it binged with a notification.

Purple: Can you tell us your address again? The idiot named Louis didn't put it in the GPS so everyone forgot.

Cantaloupe: I had to walk my turtle!

Purple: You don't walk turtles, idiot.

Marshmallow: Be nice now, Vi.

Purple: :/

Orange: 1604 Richmond Ave, Delta, WV.

Purple: Thanks, Clem! :D <3

Clem started to tear up as she sat the phone down, preparing for the Christmas party she all of a sudden dreaded.

She glanced to the blade in her hand, biting her lip as she shakily lifted up her left arm.

Why did things have to be this way?

In one swift motion, Clementine skidded the blade across her soft skin, watching as warm, crimson colored blood oozed from her wrist, hitting the brown floorboards and staining everything it touches.

It didn't hurt.

It felt good.

Made her happy.

It somehow made her pain go away.

She sighed as she wiped her tears, sitting the bloody blade on the edge of her desk to clean herself up.

Clem changed into more of a party wear; a dress made of different Christmas colors.

The dress was only to her knees; way too short for her to be comfortable with. It had red, green, and gold colored stripes up and down the dress; the gold having glitter spread across it.

Clem put her hair in her usual pigtails and put her hat on.

Funny that it still had her parents blood on it. No one could ever seem to get it off. The blood stain didn't seem too formal, but Clementine didn't care.

She looked at the make up Carley had given her, but she didn't put any on. Instead, she drowsily looked in the mirror; more specifically at her stomach.

She stuck her tongue out and gagged. Clementine hated how she looked. She hated her body. She always felt so dirty after what Timothy had done to her for years. She felt sick knowing her pictures were all over the world, and she could do nothing about it.

Clementine hated everything about herself.

She wished she could just die at times.

If she was being honest with herself, she would have killed herself as soon as Marshall was taken from her hadn't it been for the little bit of hope she had; or the Everett family; or her friends.

She sighed as she heard a knock on her bedroom door, shuffling to open the door, she held her wrist with her hand, attempting to hide the cut.

"Hey sweet pea. Everything okay?" Lee asked, standing in the door way as he watched Clem worriedly.

"Everything is okay, yeah, Lee. I'm just getting ready for the party, is all." Clem said, sighing as she shifted her weight onto one foot.

"You sure? I think I heard muffled crying up here. If anybody upset you, then by god, will they have to go through me." Lee said as his worried face contorted into anger at the mere thought.

"I'm sure. I'm just.. uh.. it's that time of the month, ya know?" Clem asked, still holding her wrist nervously.

"Alright, sweet pea. Just know, there's Ibuprofen in the medicine cabinet. If you don't want to attend the party it's fine. Love you sweet pea." Lee said with a warm smile, turning to head downstairs.

"Love you back, Lee." Clem responded back.

Clem shut her door and put her back against it. She didn't want to be here at all, but she didn't want to disappoint her friends and family.

She pulled her knee's to her chest as she cried into them.

Why did everything fall apart as it always does?

Couldn't Clem be happy?

For once?

She should be happy.

But she isn't.

Nightmares from that place. That time. All her trauma. All of it came flooding back in.

From what? Who knew. Maybe it was the fact that Marshall was back, reminding her of a harder time.

Not like she would not want to see him, though.

The nightmares.

Minerva kissing Violet.

Clem knew it wasn't Violet's fault; and maybe even not Minnie's. Minnie, somehow, didn't know they were dating. Besides, you can't control your feelings.

Violet apologized and apologized, but Clem didn't know what to do or say. She just wished she hadn't fallen witness to the kiss.

She still had frequent nightmares. Nightmares from that night where she killed her kidnapper and abuser. The way he grabbed the hem of her shirt as he kissed her. The way he grabbed her hips and tried to pull her closer. The way he even so much as looked at her. It was enough to make Clem double over and nearly puke right then and there.

Life at Ericson's wasn't exactly peachy, either. Mean kids started to bully her, calling her mean things and bringing her down, beating her up when nobody is around, and then acting like little angels when others were around.

Joey, Alex, and Justin.

Those boys were always fucking with her. Always.

Sometimes, she wanted to snap their necks in half.

Though, life at the Everett family house was a bit better.

She had a place to escape to when life at Ericson's all felt too heavy.

AJ could be a bit of a headache at times, but she loved him, and she knew that he loved her.

Luke never really talked to her; for whatever reason. She guessed he was working and doing taxes, or other boring adult things. She did know, however, that he had a boyfriend. His name was Nick.

She never met him, but from what AJ told her, Uncle Kenny liked to call Nick, 'Vanilla Ice'.

Clem understood that she could power through the dark depression she was going through. I mean, she was the leader of 'Still Not Broken' after all. She's tough, that's for sure.

As if on some sort of cue, Clem could hear the music downstairs start to play, and guests flooding in.

Christmas music, love songs, sad songs.. it seemed like the playlist was put on shuffle.

Who knows. Maybe Clem would get to dance with Violet again tonight. She loved those moments. It made her feel closer to Violet, and she really needed that right now.

. . .

Clem looked down at her phone as she awkwardly stood at the bottom of the steps. She tapped her foot and bit her lip, hadn't she been holding her phone to her face, them she'd be rubbing her wrist, too.

Purple: We're here, where are you? I know this is your family, but.. it just kinda makes me nervous not being with you.

Read at 4:16 PM

Clem didn't feel like answering. Instead, she put her phone away and looked around.

She decided she didn't want to stay there anymore; so she went to go find Rosie and Sam.