maze of memories. | lmh + hjs ✓

t w e n t y - t w o

warning: mentions of prostitution, sex, and murder

seungmin blinked his eyes open, regaining consciousness. he shifted in his covers, wincing as a sharp pain shot through his stomach. he turned his neck, looking around to observe his surroundings.

"oh lord.... fuck..." he groaned, sitting up in his bed. his room was empty, but not for long. "oh... you're awake at last. how are you feeling?" jihyo opened the door, looking frazzled.

seungmin yelped in alarm, ears flattening. "who are you?" he narrowed his eyes, suspicious of the stranger in his room. "park jihyo. i'm an old friend of the group's and i looked after you after you fainted."

she stuck her hand out for seungmin to shake. less wary, seungmin took it. "kim seungmin. um... do you know why i fainted?" he muttered, embarrassed.

kindly smiling, jihyo started to explain. "it was from i either sleep deprivation or exhaustion. possibly even both. you also have some swelling in the stomach, but it's not severe. definitely take it easy for the next few weeks, though."

"thank you." seungmin sighed. "i hope that i wasn't too much of a bother." jihyo shook her head. "no, but i think i should let you see the others. they're probably really worried. and... about hyunjin-"

"please don't... please don't let him in." seungmin whispered. "i don't- i can't face him right now."

sadly staring back, jihyo simply nodded. "okay. i'll call the others in. alright?" she stepped out of the room, closing the door behind her.

"okay." agreeing, he sank back into the warm bed, balling his fists under the sheets. his heart ached and he didn't even know why. he replayed their argument in his head, flinching at his own words.

hyunjin had told him that.... he loved him. seungmin let the tears escape, shaking his head. "don't believe in his lies. no... don't fall for it, NOT AGAIN!" he gasped for breath, trying to block out the conflict between his heart and his insecurities. he knew way too well that his insecurities were winning, and it was paining the both of them.

there was no way seungmin could possibly face hyunjin right now. not when he was like this. he bitterly laughed. hyunjin probably hated him after all those things he said. he curled up, rocking back and forth to try and ease his thoughts. 

hyunjin probably regretted everything.

///

he felt emotionless. as if he wasn't capable of feeling emotion anymore. sitting on the floor of his bedroom, leaning against the door, hyunjin sat there in a pool of his own dark thoughts.

after jihyo had come in and told him that seungmin was fine, hyunjin had felt so relieved. but he doubted if he even deserved to.

seungmin's words rang in his head again.

"don't touch me. you're disgusting."

hyunjin flinched, the image of his mother and his father flashed in his eyes. he could see too many similarities...

the door slamming.

him leaving.

"NO!" hyunjin screamed, the shriek leaving a behind a sting in his throat. his past resurfaced in his mind, his mother, his father, the arguments, his father leaving his mother for what she never did-

just like seungmin.

"STOP, GET OUT!" he yelled, fat tears spilling down, he frantically clawed at his own hair. the sudden spurt of energy gone, hyunjin looked to the ceiling, tears freely spilling. "mom..."