maze of memories. | lmh + hjs ✓

t h i r t y - s e v e n

final (official) chapter !

warning: mentions of suicide

"j-jisung. jisung?" a faint ringing grew sounded from somewhere to his left as jisung painfully stretched his eyes open for the first time in days.

"he's awake, call jihyo noona." a shaky voice muttered, moving in and around his head. weakly opening his mouth, he managed to rasp out a few words. "w-water." it felt like his brain was on fire and the only thing he could think of was the pain.

"how are you feeling? are you okay?" a familiar voice said, gently pouring some water into his dry mouth. swallowing it down, jisung attempted to sit up despite the aching pain in his head. two pairs of hands instantly came out to support him as they propped pillows up onto his bed.

now that his eyes felt focused, jisung slowly looked around the room. jihyo was carefully watching him while sitting in one of the three chairs next to his bed. the other two were occupied by hyunjin and seungmin, while jeongin was standing at the head of the bed, adjusting his pillows. another figure was quietly sitting on the ground, gazing at him with hints of concern in her eyes.

even though it was slow, jisung realized that there were people missing. "where's everyone else?" anxious thoughts and worries began to thrum though his already aching head.

"changbin hyung got shot but we got him to the city hospital and he's fine now. chan hyung's with him." hyunjin explained. "felix cried a lot when he found out but since he couldn't even visit him. he's sleeping now."

"you've been out for 3 days." the girl sitting on the floor lightly said. "just thought you might want to know." jisung shifted his full attention to the individual on the rug. she seemed familiar yet not at the same time.

"that's my sister." hyunjin butted in. "yeji. she works as a bartender in the city."

"nice to meet you." he strained out a smile, slightly embarrassed at his state. "but where's minho hyung?" he asked with as much cheerfulness in his voice as possible, ignoring the bad thoughts that were pressing at the back of his head.

hyunjin turned away while chan let out a sigh. "jisung..."

"w-what happened to him? is he okay?" fear overtook him as tears started to prick at the corners of his eyes. "he's okay, right? he's alive?"

silence.

"he's alive." seungmin quietly whispered. "he doesn't have any external wounds either. he was just slightly bruised."

"then why..." jisung trailed off, sensing the tension in the air. "what happened?"

"jisung," jihyo scooted closer and brought her hands together. "minho's father... committed suicide."

the boy on the bed covered his mouth in horror. slight relief sparked in his chest, but the pressing mix of emotions blew it out. truth be told, he had no idea what to feel. on one hand, he was a person and minho's father. his only parent that was left. but on the other hand, he had been a complete psycho, tortured both of them, and harmed changbin. "i... can i see him?"

"okay." hyunjin gently nodded. "we can try to call him in."

///

minho didn't even have tears left to cry anymore. at first he had grieved. then he was disgusted. now... everything just felt like nothing. why had he even spilled tears for that thing? his internal battle hadn't helped at all. one part of him was relived. but the man, no matter how fucked up or psychotic, was still his father. his only parent.

and now he was gone. the scene of his life drain out of him in scarlet liquid replayed again and again and again, pressing down on his heart.

he was a monster. minho kept repeating those words, trying to block out the grief through his constant reminders. he was a psycho, he did those horrifying things to jisung.

"i'm sorry." he whispered into the dark silence of his room. "i'm sorry. i failed everyone." a sob wrenched itself out of his throat as he silently bent over and cried.

he couldn't even bring himself to see jisung or changbin. the reminders that it was all his fault. the bullet in changbin's collarbone, the wounds on jisung's body, felix's condition, everything. he had hurt the very people he had found a family in.

and hurt his only left blood family as well.

gasping for air, minho shook his head. "it's all my fault."

"minho hyung?" the door open a crack, light spilling into the dark room. "jisung wants to see you. don't come if you don't want to."

"is... he okay?" he said, voice thick from tears. "he's okay, right?"

hyunjin chuckled. "you two even ask the same questions. he's fine." he let a small wave of relief wash over him as he breathed out. "let's go." walking to the edge of the messy bed, hyunjin stretched out a hand to the older.

gratefully taking it, minho shakily drew himself to his feet. "thank you." drawing in a deep breath, he slowly followed hyunjin's lead. "are changbin and felix alright?"

"they're fine." a moment of pause. "are you?" the soft question made minho turn away. the concern in the other's eyes hurt him. "i really don't know." hyunjin tightened his grip.

"we're here." minho looked up to meet the eyes of the others, who were shuffling out of the room.

guilt rose up in his throat and minho had to aggressively swallow down his own spit to push it down. hyunjin slipped his hand out of minho's and stepped back. "well i'll leave you here now."

nodding, minho took a deep breath and pushed the door open.

///

jisung sat in the warm blankets, awaiting the person he had been longing to see. the door creaked open, revealing a weary looking, tear streaked minho. hesitancy showed in his eyes, but he still staggered towards jisung, who was already spilling a few tears.

thick silence covered the space between them as jisung continued to try to blink back the tears spilling over.

"i'm sorry."

the two said in sync with each other, breaking the silence. "what are you sorry for..." jisung choked out, clutching onto the blanket wrapped around him.

"i'm the reason you're like this. i'm the reason changbin's hurt, and felix's hurt, and you... you're hurt." minho stumbled forward, falling to his knees next to the bed.

"g-get up... i'm why... everything happened." he gasped out shaky breaths of air, tears flowing freely. "if only i hadn't..." 

"my father did this to you." the kneeling boy grabbed onto the other's hand and sobbed, guilt spilling over and finally pushing him over the edge. "i'm sorry. just please don't leave me. please don't leave." he whispered.

"i could never leave you." jisung gripped minho's hand like it was his lifeline, words jumbled from his cries. "i could n-never." shaking and sobbing, the older raised his head to stare at his features.

pushing himself up to sit on the chair, minho reached forward to wipe the tears off of jisung's face. one part of him screamed that he should stay away, but the love and worry and guilt outweighed it. minho cracked a smile, feeling as if something had been freed in his chest. "i love you." speaking those three words sent a rush of euphoria though him and he felt happier than he had ever been.

"i love you too." jisung half sobbed and half laughed as he leaned forward to press their lips together.

they didn't know if anything would ever be normal or if they could ever recover from the scars they had been left with, but in that moment, lee minho and han jisung knew that they were hopelessly in love.

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ik this ending is rushed asf but i really didn't want to drag it out anymore and the scene felt like it was repeating itself from the storm night so i ended it here

notice how there's no "the end?"

no worries this isn't the final final chapter i have a special where they reverse the side effects of the experiment

goodbye for now <3