Lottie

This is War

While everyone desperately tried to keep themselves busy to distract themselves from the atrocities that had just taken place, Lottie sat alone, every day, in a cold autumn breeze next the fence and watched the walkers roam around in their prison.

Knowing that there was nothing she could do to stop whatever The Governor was planning, she decided to stay out of everyone's way knowing that she was stuck between the group and how she felt about Daryl and Merle.

Though he still slept in the same bed, Daryl hadn't spoken much to her or anyone else since the evening he returned with his brother. Knowing he was alive and safe was enough for Lottie at that moment, having spent so long not knowing where he was.

She had grown so attached to Daryl, having both spent many days protecting and saving each other. She knew how wrong it was to pick a favourite in the group, but she couldn't help it. She was loyal to everyone, however, Daryl, Rick and Carl would always come first.

One evening, when she hadn't returned for food, Rick wondered through the courtyard to find her sat on the floor by the fence in silence. He sat next to her and sighed, watching too the many flesh eating monsters.

"It's my fault, Rick." Lottie said, a little choked up.

"Why do you think that...again?" Rick replied gently.

"I came back after trusting Merle, promised him I'd put in a good word for him, then when we went to go get Maggie and Glenn...I went back for Daryl and Merle saved me." She sighed.

"So what exactly is your fault?" He questioned.

"Everyone hates Merle, The Governor wants revenge, he's going to attack again and what if someone dies Rick?" Lottie said in a panicked tone.

"You know, Daryl used to hate me?" Rick laughed.

"Because of Merle's hand right?" Lottie guessed.

"Yeah, does Daryl hate me still? No! You've got to forgive yourself for making choices that you felt were right at the time. No one blames you Lottie. Remember, Daryl came back and the only person he saw in that moment was you." Rick said reassuringly, placing his arm around her in a fatherly way.

Lottie thought for a moment about how distant Daryl had been with everyone, including her. She'd allowed him to distance himself but she wondered whether he'd ever come back from that.

Once again feeling like she was the one to mess up the group, Lottie leant a very tired head into Rick as he held her, the first father figure she'd ever had.

Rick had realised how protective he had become over Lottie, almost as much as how he was with Judith and Carl. He embraced it, not knowing how long any of them had left in the new and treacherous world.

"What are we going to do about The Governor? You know he'll come back." Lottie said quietly, looking over her shoulder to make sure no one could hear.

"We have to prepare, definitely more than last time. People watching at all hours, we cannot be caught by surprise again." He said in the most determined voice he could muster.

"What if it doesn't stop? What if he just keeps coming back?" She asked, looking out to the sea of grass and walkers.

"Well," Rick sighed, "I guess this is war."