Battle Of Hearts (COMPLETED)

Heart 38

Chatty's PoV

"Ready ka na?" Kuya checked on me.

"Wait, let me just get my bag," aniko at kinuha ang aking black valentino leather sling bag.

I only wore a simple tie-up black dress for the funeral. When we got home yesterday,nabalitaan namin na dito rin ililibing si ate Nikki. It really hurt me. And I know it's more painful kay kuya, at s'yempre, lalong-lalo na kay Ysieve.

I went out of my room. We're attending the funeral as a family so sa kotse kami ni dad sumakay. I don't really know if I'm ready to see Ysieve. Isang bagay lang naman ang gusto kong sabihin sakanya ngayon bukod sa condolence, I want to say sorry. But, right now, I feel shy and nervous...isa nga namang kahihiyan ang ginawa ko.

Alam ko na may sama siya ng loob sa akin but still there's a part of me that's hoping that he's not mad. I made a wrong choice, I know. And I'm ready to face the consequences of that choice.

Mom and dad went first. Habang kami ni kuya ay sumusunod lang. Hawak ni kuya ang braso ko. I guess he knows that I'm nervous.

"Condolence Hilary, Rafael." Sabi ni Daddy na sinundan din ni mommy.

"C-condolence po t-tita," mahina kong sabi. I'm too nervous to even speak straight.

Tita Hilary looked so pale. Habang si tito Rafael ay nasa wheelchair na. They both looked so stress and devastated. Natanaw ko si kuya Kiannu na nakasilip lang kay ate Nikki. I know that he's hurt. His twin died, his other half. Nginitian ko muna si kuya bago ko lapitan si kuya Kiannu. Kuya Van just smiled.

Dahan-dahan akong lumapit kay kuya Kiannu. As soon as I saw ate Nikki lying in that coffin wearing a white dress, kusang tumulo ang mga luha ko. I held kuya Kiannu's hand as I wipe my tears using my other hand.

"Kuya..." malumanay kong pagtawag sa kaniya. He looked at me with his sorrowful eyes. I can see the pain through his eyes.

"Ate left me,Chatty. My twin left me..." Tears started falling in his eyes.

"Kuya condolence, malulungkot si ate Nikki niyan. Ang favorite twin niya umiiyak," I fakely laughed while my tears are falling. Kuya pat my head, just like the old times.

"Favorite twin. Ako lang naman ang kakambal niya," he chuckled, but I know that it's fake.

"Oh bakit ikaw umiiyak? Magagalit si Nikki niyan. Umiiyak ang prinsesa niya," dagdag pa niya. He looked so strong while saying those things.

"Masakit e," I said, tumango naman siya at inakbayan ako.

"Sa tingin ko hindi dapat ako ang kinakausap mo e. Talk to him. Nasa labas lang siya," napatingin ako sakanya habang siya ay nakangiti lamang.

"I'm scared," simple kong sagot.

"He is too," he replied. "Go to him. Talk to him Chatty," dagdag pa niya.

Sinunod ko ang sinabi ni kuya Kiannu at lumabas. Nagpalinga-linga muna ako ngunit 'di ko pa siya agad nakita. Nang lumabas pa ako lalo ay natanaw ko siyang nasa gilid, smoking. Binubuga niya ang usok mula sa hawak niyang sigarilyo habang nakatingin sa kawalan.

Dahan-dahan at kinakabahang lumapit ako sakanya. Wala akong hinandang sasabihin kun'di 'I'm sorry'. I licked my lips before calling his attention.

"Hey," tawag ko. Binuga muna niya ang usok ng sigarilyo bago ako lingunin.

He looked more serious,now. I cannot see his feelings through his eyes. It's emotionless. More more emotionless than before.

"Lumayo ka." Natigilan ako nang sabihin niya ito.

"H-ha?"

"Lumayo ka. Masamang makalanghap ka ng sigarilyo," paglilinaw niya kaya napaatras ako nang kaunti.

Inupos niya ang sigarilyo at itinapon sa basurahan sa kaniyang tabi. Kumuha siya ng candy mula sa kaniyang bulsa t'yaka kinain.

"Anong kailangan mo?" Walang emosyon niyang tanong.

"Ahm...I...I want to say," agad niya akong pinutol at pinagtaasan ng kilay.

"Sorry?" He smirked. "May magagawa ba 'yang sorry mo?" Dagdag pa niya.

His words hit me like a knife. I feel like my heart's bleeding even though it's just words. Words coming from my dream, but I left him for the promise. Sinaktan ko siya. Kaya deserve ko naman 'to hindi ba?

"Yeah, ahm...alam kong walang magagawa. My sorry will not ease the pain you're feeling. I just want to say sorry because I truly am sorry," I said,looking at his emotionless eyes. Umiling-iling siya.

"You're sorry because?" He looked away.

"Because I left you." Diretsa kong sagot. He just smirked and look back at me.

"You're not even sorry for not being by my side when I needed you the most." He coldly said. Napaatras ako nang bahagya.

"A-ahm..."

"Bakit ka pa bumalik?" He chuckled and slap his head lightly. "Yeah, ate's funeral. Bakit mo nga naman ako babalikan? You made a decision already. Silly me," he chuckled but I can sense the sorrow on him.

"Ysieve..."

"Don't talk," tinaas niya ang kanyang hintuturo at itinuro sa kanyang sarili. "Let me talk."

I remained quiet. Nakatingin lamang sakanya.

"You left me in the time I need you the most. Hear me? You hurt me in the time I need to be strong for my family. How can I be strong if I, myself is wrecked because of a stupid girl na hindi man lang nagdalawang isip na iwan ako?" His tears started falling. He harshly wiped it.

"You didn't even had a second thought of leaving me. You just left," pagpapatuloy niya.

Tamang-tama ako sa bawat salitang binibigawan niya. The guilt is eating me...

"Noong kailangan ko ng karamay, wala ka. Noong kailangan ko ng pagkukuhanan ng lakas, wala ka rin! Ubos na ubos na ako Chatty! Hindi ko alam saan pa ako kukuha ng lakas. Wala ka kasi mas pinili mo 'yung ex mong paulit-ulit kang sinasaktan kaysa sa akin na kahit padapuan ka ng lamok, hindi ko magawa!" He shouted and cried hard. Tumalikod siya at pinunasan ang mga luha.

"Before I left the country, I was still hoping na mayroong Chatty na susunod sa akin. Kasi ubos na ubos na ako. Wala na akong lakas para lumaban ulit." Humarap siya sa akin. "Kasi 'yung lakas ko pinagpalit ako sa kahinaan niya." Pagpapatuloy niya at ngumiti.

"Sorry," 'yun lamang ang nasabi ko.

"Do you know what I felt when you left? Hindi mo alam 'yung pakiramdam na maiwan sa giyera na ikaw lang pala 'yung sundalong lumalaban. You left me in that battle hanging and waiting for you to fight with me. But you didn't." He said.

"Gusto kong magalit sayo. Gusto kong kalimutan ka. Tanggalin ka sa sistema ko, sa puso ko! Noon konti nalang e! Konti nalang Chatty! Pero anong ginawa mo? Pumasok ka ulit sa buhay ko para iwanan nanaman ako! Minahal mo ako ulit para durugin ng paulit-ulit! I am so wrecked. Ni hindi ko alam paano ako magsisimula. Because the moment you left me, you also took a half of me," he shouted out of his devastation.

And here's me, crying. Kasalanan ko naman e. It's my fault that I'm feeling this way. It's my fault kaya kami nagkaganito.

"Oh? Anong iniiyak-iyak mo? Umiyak ka lang. Because the moment you decided to leave, I already said that there will be no Ysieve Sollera na aalo sayo," he said and left me there crying.

So ganito 'yung pakiramdam niya noong iniwan ko siya? This is how it feels to be left by your true love.

Humagulgol lamang ako. Niyakap ang mga tuhod habang umiiyak. I feel so wrecked. It hurts so much being stabbed by thrutful hurting words by my true love. This is what I deserve for leaving him. This is what I deserve for hurting him.