from august to december

chapter twelve

flashback, five and a half years ago;

the scent of strawberries filled leo's nose, it was sweet, mixed with the heavy perfume floating around the hallway.

at almost two o' clock at night, the only light in the house that was still on, were the lights to yuri's studio, he was probably still working on a painting.

leo quietly tiptoed over, being unable to sleep himself.

at first he just stood in front of the dark wooden door, his head pressed against it lightly, and in his head he imagined how the older would be sitting inside, some soft jazz playing in the background.

the hallway to his studio would always smell like him.

his scent was comforting, just like his deep voice when he hummed to the song that was playing on the cassette player when leo quietly pressed down the door handle.

yuri was sitting at his desk, a half smoked cigarette between his lips and the window wide open, the only source of light in the room being the small and dusty desk lamp that illuminated only his paper.

from the long black hair that yuri had tied back into a little manbun a few strands were falling into his face, the yellow light made his features look smooth but showed his chapped lips.

a cloud of smoke exited his mouth when he sighed deeply and looked up from under his glasses at the youngest.

"leo?" he asked lowly, leaning back in his chair which made it squeak a little.

the youngest just stood there helplessly, his equally black hair being messy from turning and tossing around his bed in a failed attempt to get rest.

it was way too dark for yuri to see his friend, so he quickly turned over to turn on the big ceiling light.

it was a little chandelier, and in an instant the tiny room lit up.

yuri chuckled when he saw the other standing there in his pajamas, still holding onto the door handle.

"come in," yuri said quickly before getting up from his desk and closing the window slightly.

with those words, the youngest now entered the room fully and closed the door behind him, while he watched yuri as he climbed the windowsill, lighting himself the next cigarette and blowing the smoke out the window.

leo thought about how graceful and peaceful he looked, just smoking the cigarette, soothing music playing in the background and him gazing at the stars.

"i can't sleep," leo whispered before walking closer to his older friend, also jumping up and sitting down opposite from yuri, crossing his legs.

he looked out the window to see the stars.
they weren't in a big city, no car was passing by at those hours and all the stores were closed.

"you've come to the wrong person," the dark haired laughed, lifting his face to blow the smoke upwards, before adjusting his seating position.

"you know i don't sleep," yuri said with his low voice, untying his hair and letting the slightly waved strands fall down to frame his face.

even without the suiting light from earlier, yuri himato's skin and eyes looked smooth and warm.

leo collins tried to smile, but it looked forced, and the older noticed.

he even tossed the cigarette out the window, clapped his hands together before intensely staring at the younger.

"what's on your mind?" he asked him and crossed his arms in front of his chest, placing his head against the dark window frame, not breaking the eye contact.

leo closed his eyes and swallowed thickly.

"hiroto."

after a while of silence, yuri nodded to signalize the other to keep going.

"i have this thing prepared for him," he murmured and played with the fabric of his white pajama blouse.

yuri tilted his head and slightly furrowed his brows at the statement.

"what thing?"

leo bit his bottom lip nervously, it was about time for his big confession.

"you might wanna know the backstory first," he started. "where all of this comes from."

the other was growing more and more confused with the minute, and also impatient.

"just be straightforward, you can tell me anything," he reassured before leo took a deep breath.

"we're dating," he voiced out and searched yuri's face for any sort of expression.

however, the older nodded, putting his feelings aside for the moment, nonetheless lighting up another cigarette from his jean pocket.

"a-are you not gonna say anything to that?"
"what do you want me to say? i'm happy for you."

leo looked away, out of the window to get his thoughts straight.

"it's not that big of a deal to me, i'm pretty busy doing my own thing these days, as long as you-"

"but we're supposed to be a family, we're supposed to be close, you're supposed to care."

leo locked eyes with yuri while speaking, making sure to notice any change in his facial expression.

but it was useless, the dark haired's emotions could never be visible on the outside.

both fell silent.

"i got him promise rings."

leo whispered, but the other just seemed to be responding with a small sniffle.

"you always don't care."

that wasn't true.
yuri only pretended like he didn't really care.

as soon as things got serious, he was running away.

he just broke off the heavy eye contact and looked over at his messy desk, the oil paints were laid around the paper, a half finished portrait laying there.

and when even after minutes, nobody of the two said anything, leo quietly jumped down, making his way back to the door he entered from.

"you're gonna regret it, you're gonna regret being like that," he hissed, a burning expression on his face.

"and you're gonna be terribly sick one day, i can assure you that much," he added while staring at the cigarette.

and with that, the wooden door slammed shut again, as if nothing had ever happened.