𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙻𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝙾𝚏 𝙿𝚎𝚝𝚎𝚛

Anxiety/Spideychelle part 1

(I, by all means, am NOT romanticizing Anxiety at all. I'm not fully sure if I have it but I do know what a fragment of it feels like and it sucks. Please do not get offended:) I'm describing it the best I can from experience and research. Also far from home doesn't happen!)

Trigger warning: Anxiety attack sort of PTSD?

description: Peter's at a movie theatre with his class and there's a part in the beginning that triggers it. At first, he's more or less ok but when there was something else that takes it further. Mj talks him through it.
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《MAJOR ENDGAME SPOILERS》

The line was definitely longer than I expected. There were teenagers to adults to young children, eager to get their tickets and snacks. It was around 15 minutes in when we finally made it to the front, ordering our treats whilst the teachers got the tickets. 

I'm not too sure it was a good idea to leave us alone in the line up while we wait, thanks to the overly immature individuals who lacked any sort of way to remain quiet, erupting into loud obnoxious chatter every 2 minutes. 

"-Excuse me sir, what would you like to order?" He sounded irritated by the expression on his face and the way he spoke. I must've been distracted in my own thoughts to notice.

"Oh uh, sorry. Can I have an extra-large popcorn, two packets of M&M's and a large coke."

He narrowed his eyes at me, furrowing his brows. He must've been wondering how on earth can a small scrawny kid like me fit so much food. That's all thanks to my metabolism. 

'Great, now he's probably wondering if my family feeds me'

'God I probably look so stupid'

'Yep, I just made a fool of myself that's just great.'

I continued to internally scold myself, thinking of how stupid I probably looked and acted.

My thoughts were once again cut off by the teacher telling me to pick up my pace and get into the theatre already. Ned tugged on my sleeve harsher then I anticipated and practically dragged me to our seats.

As the movie began not a second later after we came in, Ned, Mj and I hurried to find out seats. Did I mention Mj's our friend now? After the whole blip thing and the final battle, we became closer, the well-known trio of nerds. Well, not THAT well known, I may have been exaggerating a bit since we're not exactly popular. 

Ned and I began chattering in a low whisper, trying and failing not to disturb anyone. Not our fault the beginning was boring. 

"Ned, Peter shut up! we're trying to watch a movie!" Michelle hissed angrily. That girl really loves her movies. Almost as much as her books. Almost.

Several shush followed after her as we finally shut up and watched the movie. Halfway through the movie, there was a scene where a building collapsed. That might not have seemed like much to others, but try being under one.

My spidey senses were tingling and a feeling of restlessness bubbled in my stomach. Like a butterfly feeling. But not the good kind.

I continued to watch the movie, fiddling with the glasses Mr stark gave me awhile back, that had Karen installed in it. They were horrifying, to say the least, and looked awful on me, but kept them either way.

As I was chatting to Ned he tapped my shoulder to look at the screen. I was not expecting what I saw. There he was, in all his glory Tont stark on the wide movie screen playing a short clip to honor him.

My heart sunk at the picture of him, my thoughts beginning all meddles together and my heart racing at an inhuman speed.

This was not good, not good at all.

I thought I'd be okay after whispering reassuring words to myself to stay calm. Clearly I was wrong.

My heart was racing, pounding as if it was going to burst out of my chest. It was heard to swallow, thick gulps came every time I attempted to. I took a deep breath. Well tried to atleast. It's been so long.

Shit

I gripped the sides of my chair closing my eyes. Still, no luck.

This can't be happening.

I stood up, startling Ned and Mj, not that it mattered to much in the heat of the moment. I'd regret it later anyway.

I sprinted to the bathroom, muttering a small I need to go to the teacher and slammed the door behind me.

I slid down the stall wall, burying my head in my hands hyperventilating. Each time I breathed it felt like a knife was being shoved into my throat, everytime hurting more then the last.

My palms were sweaty and my hands trembled. I shut my eyes tightly whispering reassuring thoughts to myself, unfortunately, failing. I felt my heart being ripped out of my chest the more I thought about it.

Tony was dead. He was never coming back. I was alone. My mentor is gone. Forever.

That only added to the negative thoughts already spurring in my brain, making me heart beat faster and making me panic even more.

Keep it together Parker, keep it godamn together! You failed Tony and now you have failed yourself.

I tugged on the ends of my hoodies, sinking further into it until it completely engulfed. I pulled on a strand of my hair, trying so hard to breathe. A once easy task, now impossible.

If I keep this up I'm going to die.

Of course I was being a little dramatic...scratch that, overly dramatic. I was not gonna die, but the pain made it feel like it.

For third and hopefully last time that day, I was interrupted by the voice I least wanted to hear.

"Peter?"

I could feel someone's presence, but couldn't hear it, thanks to my occupied thoughts, that are declining my ability to breath.

It was definitely a she. I could hardly make out bits and peices of her voice but I was sure it wasn't Ned since well he wasn't a girl. It was fuzzy and echoey, sounding farther away then it probably is.

The voice shouted my name and started pounding at the door. I shakily reached for the handle, opening it, and slowly retracted my hand.

There stood Mj, looking distressed. That was probably the most emotion she's shown in the past two years. The once emotionless sarcastic Mj, became a worried, soft distressed one, leaving me baffled.

"Hey, hey Peter it's going to be ok, I promise. Just try to breathe ok."

Easier said then done

I did what she asked, trying for the millionth time to take a breath, failing again.

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I'm so sorry for late update, I'm going to try setting up a better schedule for you guys. And can I just say... LIKE OMG THANK YOU SOOO MUCH FOR 1.31K READS LIKE WOWWW YOU GUYS ARE THE BESTTT🥺💕 hope you all continue to read my story as there are many many more chapters coming. As always, comment and vote! I'm going to update the big bro chapter and this one soon ! So you guys will get 2 chapters in a day!

Byes~

Spidey out 💓🕷