𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 ; 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗄𝗂 ✓

03

h: heather for admiration
𑁍

the call with his dad couldn't seem to satisfy kihyun at all. it even made him more curious as to who that boy was. the fact that his father spoke so openly about him not having many friends didn't bother him at all. that wasn't a problem because it simply was a fact. kihyun has always had troubles in finding friends. not because the people around him weren't nice enough or anything like that, but because kihyun had always had a strong character and that made it a lot more difficult for him to accept and trust others.
so rather than it being kihyun's fault, it was that others didn't really like him in the first place. he was struggling to open up to others what made it hard for him to meet new people. he never liked crowds and through bad experiences from his early childhood, his trust issues only kept growing instead of getting lose. like that, people in general tended to avoid him because they just knew that even trying to befriend with him was pretty much useless. you could say that kihyun wasn't a person who liked having many friends either. if they were true friends, two were more than enough.
minhyuk and hyunwoo were his only ones up until today. they have been together in school for a long time, but after their graduation, they somehow lost each other. they grew apart due to traveling and each of their own plans of spending their future. but that was kind of the least thing kihyun could worry about now.

it was 3:56 am when he decided to try and go to sleep.
he wasn't tired and sleeping wasn't really something he wanted to do either. but still, it was probably the only way to have any chance in finding out more. by now, it was a sure thing that he would dream of this boy again and knowing that he wouldn't be able to just ignore everything that has been happening, he kept hoping for something that could help explain it. for changes that might finally dissolve whatever was going on. maybe one night it would simply stop? maybe one night his dream would reveal something that could give the needed hint for kihyun to figure it all out? maybe something would happen that suddenly gives it all away?

he honestly didn't expect anything to change, not yet at least. but he still hoped that at some point, he'll get any idea of what was happening to him. and until then, all he could do was to keep trying to collect as much information as he could and well, sleep was kind of his only source for now. so he went for it.
it didn't take too long until he fell asleep and he saw him again. it was like experiencing a lucid dream, because kihyun clearly knew that he was dreaming, but he didn't have the control. and once again, he couldn't do anything but watch.

𑁍

he's walking.
the same street as every night over the past weeks.

this night, it's raining again.
he's listening to music.
the song that's playing, it's familiar.

the boy seems to be sadder.
another detail that starts changing.

the petals are falling again.

he's coughing.
more, and harder than before.
something that seems to change as well.

he gets worse.
the feelings, the emotions he's experiencing, they appear to grow stronger.

unhappiness and agony.
sadness and sorrow.
despair and melancholy.
his misery.

it seems to win over him, to kill him slowly but surely from the inside.
and the boy appears to weaken.
he looks so exhausted.

the petals, the amount of them,
it grows too.

once again the color of this pure white.
it symbolizes sincerity.

but what does it mean?

the same cycle repeats itself.
he keeps walking, he keeps coughing, he keeps suffering until he arrives on the bridge again.

he is standing on the very same spot like each time.
and it starts.

he climbs over.
he's shaking from the cold and the fear he feels itself.
his clothes are drained in rainwater.

and he cries.
then he smiles again, sadly.

"kihyun, are you there?"

he coughs. he's hurting. he's in pain.
the petals fall down.

"help me out."

𑁍

and kihyun wakes up, realizing it's already 9:59 am.
how was this even possible?

now the brown haired was only laying in bed, his eyes closed as he regained the memory of the dream he just had. and as always, he remembered everything. of course he did. but one thing that he remembered specifically detailed this time, was his face. the boy had such a soft skin, even though his cheeks were wet from all the rain and because he was crying.
kihyun remembered each and every single one of his features so clearly. his eyes, that beautiful, deep dark brown, they were literally shining. his lips, they had the perfect shape, a peach tone. his nose, such good proportions. his face did seem a bit more puffy than usual, but he was still so good looking. he's cute. as he recalled everything happening, he could picture the scenario in his mind, his eyes still closed and kihyun himself fully focused on whatever was going on inside his head. he could still see the raindrops falling onto his face, some softly ricocheting off of him. and the boy's hair, it was once again soaked in rainwater and still, he looked as stunning as ever.

kihyun spent about an hour longer in his bed, doing nothing but trying to sort out all of the information he has gotten so far. and just before he decided to finally get up, he took out his journal that he kept in one of the drawers of his nightstand and noted down any changes that occurred in today's dream, comparing it with all the information he had written down up until now. he wrote down the song that played and it's artist too. kihyun described the weather, how it was raining so heavily and how the boy didn't seem to care at all about how wet his hair and clothes were getting. and he wrote down the repeated color of flower petals. he has researched the meaning of the white tulip before, that appears to be the flower of which the boy keeps on coughing up petals from. through his research, he found out that worthiness, protection, forgiveness, respect and purity are associated with the flower. tulips in general are seen as symbol of generally perfect love. and the more kihyun gets into it, the more his curiosity rises and although whatever is going on does scare him in some way, he wouldn't stop. he needed to find this boy, because nevertheless he did feel drawn to him and simply trying to forget about it, wasn't an option anymore.
he had to know who that person was and why he felt this way. kihyun needed to find out the truth.